Lost and Found
by Optical Goddess
Summary: A mustread for all Squinoa fans. A nice romance fic set about 5 years from the game the heroic teens have matured and grown up a bit. I've spent MANY many hours on this and had so much fun putting it together. Complete.
1. Default Chapter

"LOST AND FOUND"

By

Optical Goddess

The two men turned the corner and headed for the Dollet pub.There seemed to be a lot of people near the entrance, especially for only a Tuesday night.Maybe it was the weather.It wasn't an average chilliness like most November nights.Suppose everyone wanted to get out before it began to really get cold for the season.

They casually made their way to the heavy lit-up door to the _Shining Bomber_.Outside was a sign that read "Amateur Night", along with many neon liquor advertisements.Once inside they heard some techno music playing from a jukebox, but had a nice mellow volume level.The two men took a seat at the bar.

"Two homemade brews, please," Zell motioned the bartender.Dollet was known for their great home breweries."Man, it's been a long time, eh?" he asked Squall.

"Huh?No, not really.You just got plastered last week," Squall smirked.

Zell gave him a sideways glance."Heh, no I'm talking 'bout since the last time we were in this city.Five years since our initial field exam...And what do you mean **I** got plastered?!You were so gone way too early on in the night, you even told me stuff I could probably blackmail you with if I wanted to."

Squall just laughed to himself, thinking about how it was so unlike himself to do a few foolish things with their other friends a week ago.They were out celebrating after a very long covert SeeD mission that finally came to a head that day.Now it was back to normal; finish one mission, begin another.

"It's been about three years for me," Squall finally answered the question Zell had asked in the first place."I came to visit Rinoa a few times when she first started going to school here."

"Oh, yeah, that's right.I forgot she was attending here.Wow, she must be close to graduating by now.That is, if she didn't drop out or anything."

Great, now that he had to mention her name he began to think about her.He started to reminisce back to when they were 17 again.Shortly after the whole Ultimecia incident, their lives seemed to change so fast, but for the better he had to admit.A lot of personal struggles immediately followed, like finding out about the couple family members he still had alive, Rinoa trying to rebuild her relationship with hers, gaining new responsibilities in Garden, and just trying to be a better person in general.But what made those hardships all worthwhile, was knowing she was there for him, he for her, and knowing that absolutely anything was possible.She proved that to him.

She was his first love.Everyone says you never forget your first.Well, they were absolutely right.He remembered more things about their relationship than he could recall with any others he had after her.Of course, that was also the longest relationship he had had too; almost two years they dated.

Things were going so well for the longest time.Their relationship moved pretty slow for nearly that first year, until they both turned 18.Funny how that one number made you feel like you instantly grew up and were ready for new, exciting things.A warm feeling crept over him as he remembered the night they both lost their innocence, not planned, of course.

It was the night of the next annual SeeD Graduation ball, marking his one year anniversary as a SeeD, now almost an exact year since the night they first met and shared those couple special minutes together that had such an impact on his life.

He had a couple surprises for her, now that Zell finally got around to doing this favor for him, and what Zell promised Rinoa he'd make for her before they were even an item.Since Zell was crafty in metals, he finally made that replica of Squall's ring to fit Rinoa.But that was just for starters.Squall asked Zell if he could also make a tiny replica of the symbol on his chain around his neck.

"Sure!I'll do that thingy on your necklace too!" Zell exclaimed.

"It's not a 'necklace'!It's my chain," Squall simply stated.

"Uh...sure," Zell spoke in a deep voice."Your **chain**," he said with exaggerated masculinity.

So he and Zell went looking for the raw materials they needed:a small plain silver necklace, fine silver for the object to hang on the chain, and lastly a small fine genuine diamond to be embedded for the lion's eye.He wanted it to be fine and delicate, in contrast to his bold and heavy one he wore.He thought this would mean a lot to her, being custom made by one of their closest friends and all.

After dancing and socializing for about an hour, Squall could tell Rinoa was itching for a little privacy with him, away from all the people for a little bit.He wanted the same, looking for the right time to present her withthe jewelry.Hmm, the balcony?There were already afew couples making use of it.

"Want to go for a walk outside or something?It's pretty nice out yet," Squall asked.It was right on the verge of summer, and the air was quickly warming from spring.

"Mmm, I would love that!"she smiled back and locked her arm in his.

They made their way out by the front gate, nodding to the receptionist as they left.The outside air was warmer than usual, almost a bit humid feeling.They began to walk south toward the beach along the Rinaul Coast.It was beginning to feel warmer and Squall was feeling sweat form inside his uniform. Was it this weather, or just him? He didn't know.He was starting to get nervous about giving her those gifts.How would she react?Why am I nervous? he asked himself.That's why he headed towards the beach.Maybe the air by the water would cool him down and make him feel more relaxed.

Rinoa kicked off her heels and carried her shoes while they walked along the shore with an arm around the other's waist.They walked in comfortable silence, not always needing words to enjoy the other's company.When they got to the far end of the beach they slowed, knowing they'd have to eventually turn around and head back the way they came.But not just yet.

Squall turned to face her and looked intently into her eyes.Being quite far form the Garden now, the only illumination was the big moon in the sky and its reflection bounding off the water.Now that reflection also sparkled off her eyes.

"Um...I have something for you," Squall stammered.He reached into one pocket and pulled out the ring Zell made, hoping it was still there and didn't fly out while he was dancing.

Rinoa gasped in delight."I figured he just forgot all about it!Oh, it's wonderful!"

Squall took her hand and slipped on her new ring.Before letting go, he gently kissed her fingertips.She giggled, he looked so gallant in his uniform doing this simple motion.So formal, like as if they were in front of an audience getting married or something.

"I suppose it's time you get this one back then?" she asked as she undid the clasp on her necklace that held the two rings.She slipped his original off her chain and proceeded to put it back on his finger, mimicking the same motions he did, following it with a kiss to his fingertips.She couldn't help but giggle again.

"Don't bother putting it back on," Squall gestured to the necklace now with just its plain original ring hanging all alone again.Rinoa looked at him questioningly.He felt so excited.It was rare when he gave her any material goods to show his affection.He had been slowly but surely learning how to show it through himself.

This time he reached into his other pocket and pulled out a slender box.A bigger smile formed on Squall's lips, and Rinoa matched it, sensing this heightened anticipation, not sure how to react.She certainly wasn't expecting any of it, he and Zell were the only ones who knew of the surprise, and Zell being the one to actually create it, certainly wasn't going to spill the beans to anyone else (though he was dying to) equally wanting Rinoa to be surprised and admire his work.

Squall opened the box.The shiny silver and tiny diamond glistened in the moonlight.Her mouth dropped open."Wh...you...Squ...I mean... the ring was enough, you didn't have to..." Rinoa laughed nervously, not being able to find the words to express her excitement, happiness, curiosity and shock all at the same time.She studied it more."This is just like yours in a way.Where on earth did you happen to find this?!"

"I didn't find it.You can thank Zell for this too."

"You mean, he made this, besides the ring?!Oh, Squall, I'm so...I just can't believe...this is..." she couldn't speak anymore as tears started to burn her eyes.She threw her arms around his neck and held him tight.

"Um, d-do you like it?" Squall asked, not quite expecting her to cry on his shoulder.

She drew back to look at him, wiping her cheeks."Do I like it?!Squall, if it was the most hideous thing I would still love it.This isn't just some pieceof jewelry.I can tell you probably put a lot of thought into producing this.And to top it off, was even handmade by someone we know."

That made him smile."Can I put it on?"

"Oh!Yes, I suppose.I'm sorry.I'm just so flabbergasted and afraid to take it out of the box!"

He chuckled and reached around the back of her head, purposely letting his fingers lightly brush the back of her neck while he fussed with the clasp.He could see the little hairs of her neck stand up.Once on, he lowered his arms to her waist again.She touched the tiny lionhead which rested about an inch above the slight cleavage made by her dress.

"How does it look?" she asked.His eyes scanned from the necklace slowly on up until he reached her face.

"She's beautiful."

Rinoa blushed to Squall's comment as his face came closer.Their eyes closed and they shared a long passionate kiss.

"Thank you, Squall, for everything you've given me.I really mean that," she paused and made a silly grin."That WAS everything, right?You don't have anymore surprises hiding in here for me?" as she playfully put her hands in his front pockets fishing for anything else that might interest her.His eyes became huge and his face hot, realizing how close her hands were to something that developed from that kiss.

She laughed to see one of his spontaneous, rare expressions on his face.She withdrew her hands from that area and wrapped them once again around his body.This time it was her turn to kiss him.She was feeling so much appreciation and love for him that moment.She pressed her whole body tightly against him and planted her lips with much force.They began to kiss more intimately, parting and tugging at each other's bottom lip, further opening their mouths...

Rinoa pulled back after a few minutes and looked out over the lake.Small waves rolled in and cascaded on the shore.The freshwater smell and slight cool breeze hovering over the surface of the water inspired her.A mischievous smile crept on her face as she studied the water, looked back towards the direction of Garden, and then a quick look at their surroundings.She then looked at Squall with a wicked grin.

"I've got a perfect idea!" she said slyly.

"... What?" he asked in anticipation and fearfulness.

"Let's go swimming!"

Now those rare expressions of his were becoming not so rare anymore."What!!Uh, no.You're not serious.You can't be.Anything could happen!"

"Exactly!Anything could happen," she winked.She turned and faced the water.She took a few steps ahead of him so she had her back to him.

"But wait!We don't have any suits or anything!" he retorted, knowing that Rinoa was fully aware of that.

"So," she pulled her dress up over her head."And don't bother using the excuse that you can't swim 'cause being a SeeD, I know you can."She peeled off her undergarments.

"What if we get caught?Anyone could come here, report us--"

"We're out of sight from Garden, and no one has come way out here yet," she kicked off her panties and walked briskly into the water.Still facing away from him she called, "Let me know when you're in!"

Squall just stood there, dumbfounded.He could not believe this was happening.His mind was going back and forth._What if someone followed us here?Holy shit, I just saw Rinoa's bare ass.What do I do?We're only young once.Maybe in a fantasy, but for real?Ooh, but for real would be **so** much nicer than in his mind.Rinoa, naked, now, water..._He took a quick glance all around him and reluctantly gave in, quickly undressing.

"I can't **believe** you talked me into this," he muttered as he pulled down his pants.He cupped his hand in front of him as he quickly stepped in, wanting to disguise his bare body in the dark water.Once past his waist he called, "All right, I'm in."

Rinoa turned around to face him as he swam near her.She remained silent.Once he was still a few feet away, she quickly ducked underneath and swam in a different direction, eventually stopping to pop her head up to see Squall looking around some yards to her left.He spotted her and also went under the surface to swim to her new location.He resurfaced to find her now in a completely different area again.She flashed him a quick smile and dove underwater yet again.Squall was catching on to her little game, staying right where he was, keeping his head low so he could still see above the water.Once he saw the top of her head surfacing, he drew in a deep breath and quickly went under before he knew she'd see him.He swam deep below and fast, hoping to finally catch her before she took off again.But if she didn't see him when she came up just now, she'd probably still be waiting there, laughing to herself how she was fooling him.

Squall wished he could open his eyes and see what was ahead of him.He waved his arms in front and kicked his legs, hoping he was still deep enough that she wouldn't be able to see him approaching.

His hand brushed past something and he grabbed hold of it.Rinoa let out a gasp as she felt something tighten around her thigh.Squall knew he had to be right up to her by now.He tilted up his head with a smile and resurfaced.He wasn't sure what he grabbed while he was down there, but figured she wouldn't mind considering how risqué she was feeling.

They were far out but could still touch the ground.Squall was beginning to loosen up.They casually played around in the water, splashing each other, making bets on who could swim the fastest, and laughing like a couple innocent children.

Feeling quite relaxed now and catching their breath after playing their little games, they just treaded the water slightly, holding both hands, their bare shoulders protruding out of the water.

"Doesn't this feel great?!I've never done this before.It feels so free, so liberating, so...natural," Rinoa said and let her hands move up his biceps.

_So horny_, thought Squall.Although now that they weren't as active in the water, it was beginning to chill their bodies, hindering him from getting too excited.

As she moved up his arms, she also got a little closer to his body."Is my necklace still there?"She knew she could easily check for herself, but wanted Squall to look as she lifted her torso ever so slightly to show off a little more skin.

He looked down and traced his fingers on the chain along her collarbone.His heart beat more rapid the lower his fingers got, until he reached the tiny lion."Still there."He pondered if he should continue on with his fingers, to go straight down the middle of her chest.He'd never been in this territory yet._What would be the harm in it?It's not like I'd be actually touching anything._

Her words interrupted his dirty thoughts."Are you still wearing your watch?" she asked with a shiver.

"We've been here for about half hour.Getting cold?"

She nodded and chattered her teeth."That and I'm starting to feel a little paranoid the longer we're out here."

"Oh, sure.**Now** the paranoia sets in!"

She laughed and gave him a playful shove."Shut up.Let's head back."

They swam back to shore, both getting out into the brisk air at the same time.By now they were freezing and quickly dressed, avoiding trying to sneak a peek at the other.

With their damp clothes and drenched hair Squall said, "You know we can't go back to the party looking like this."

"Well, let's enter Garden from the balcony exit on 2F and try to make our way unnoticed to the dorms."

Squall blew a sigh of relief that he didn't see anyone else outside as they made their way back to Garden.Once inside, they quickened their pace past the classrooms, down the corridor and waited for the elevator.The doors opened, but it was not empty.Irvine and Selphie stood there in their own world, oblivious to the wide-eyed couple that thought they'd now been caught.

Squall cleared his throat to get their attention off of each other.

"Whoa!Uh...we didn't think there'd be anyone up here!" stammered Irvine.

"We didn't think there'd be anyone using this elevator," countered Rinoa.

"Just trying to get a little privacy, you know?" Irving said sheepishly, then noticed how wet they looked, glad to change the subject."Why are you guys all wet?"

"Uh...we were..." Squall stuttered.

Rinoa cut in, "...caught in a downpour!Outside."

"Yeah!It was...yeah," Squall followed up brilliantly.

"It's raining?Oh," Selphie shrugged."Hmm, go figure.The weatherman said it was supposed to be beautiful tonight.Guess he was wrong again.Well, see ya later!"

The gullible couple stepped out to let Squall and Rinoa get on and go about their business.When the doors closed, they broke into quiet but intense laughter.

"I can't believe they bought that!" Rinoa clutched her stomach.Squall could see how excited she was by trying to avoid being caught after doing something so forbidden.And he felt it too, this was definitely more exciting than any mission."Let's just hope that if we run into anyone else, that excuse still flies."

They didn't have a chance to use it on anyone else; the halls were clear when they got to his room.Squall felt chilled to the bone and Rinoa noticed.

"I'm sorry.'Cause of my insane idea I'll probably make you come down with something."

"Ohh, don't worry about it," he laughed."Small price to pay for the most exciting and daring thing I've ever done outside of SeeD work."

"Well, why don't you go take a nice hot shower to warm back up?" she gestured toward the bathroom.

"Hmm, good idea.You won't mind?You can use it after me if you want."

"No, go ahead."_But I'm not going to wait until you're done before I start mine_, she thought nastily._Boy, am I full of wicked ideas tonight_.

He closed the bathroom door all the way but didn't latch it.Once Rinoa heard the shower running for a few minutes and shower door click, she peeled off her clothing for the second time that night.Opening the bathroom door very carefully she peeked in. Beyond the frosted glass door she made out his lanky silouhette.She stood there for a moment, admiring the figure in the single stall.She proceeded to walk forward, her heart pounding.

Squall let the hot water run down his hair and face as he reflected on this night's events, smiling to himself._I can't believe we did that.Rinoa, yes.But **me**?She brings out things in me I never knew were there._Then he heard a knock on the door.The **shower** door.

"What the..." he turned and saw a blurry flesh-colored figure with dark hair on the other side."Rinoa?"

"Mind if I join you?"She didn't wait for an answer as she clicked it open.She stepped in fully, shutting the door behind her.

"Oh my God," is all Squall could muster, at the same time dropping the bar of soap he was holding.Rinoa bent down to pick it up.As she slowly stood back up, her eyes roamed over his ankles and made their way to his legs, abdomen, chest, and finally his red-cheeked face.

"Drop something?" she asked with a certain look in her eye.There she was, stark naked in his shower with him, droplets of water dripping off her body.Now, swimming in the dark where the water hid everything was one thing.And even when they got out of the lake, they were both so cold and quickly dressed, not wandering their eyes to check the other out.But now in the bright lights and warmth of the bathroom, he could see her in all her glory.And she could see all of him... more and more every few seconds.

One thing led to another and ended up with Squall rolling off the edge of his single bed that next morning, forgetting there wasn't much room left with another person in it.

Several months went by, life was starting to become a rut.Nothing new and life-threatening was happening in the world at that time.Rinoa felt like her life was going nowhere staying at Garden.She wasn't a SeeD and felt like she had nothing to offer, besides being a sorceress.But that really had nothing to do with anything.It was actually kind of contradictory.And she and Squall's relationship was kind of at a standstill, definitely not progressing.They just did the same thing day after day, night after night, going through the motions, taking each other for granted.

Something needed to change.So Rinoa decided to attend university and go for a degree in psychology.The complexities of the human mind fascinated her (which maybe explained her interest in Squall.)Attending in Deling City was out of the question.She made amends with her father, but didn't want to particularly live so close to him.And Esthar felt too close to home with her boyfriend's father ruling it.So Dollet seemed the next choice.She wanted freedom, to prove she could hold her own again, disregarding her powers.Not necessarily freedom from **everything**, she and Squall still had something.

Squall felt disappointed that she was leaving the presence of her knight, that she was leaving the best place for them to be together.But he wanted her to be happy and glad she had the drive to learn.Of course this now meant they'd have to struggle through a long-distance relationship and everything that came with it: loneliness, staying faithful, trust.They promised to write and call often and visit whenever possible.On nearby SeeD missions, Squall was able to steal away a little time and go visit her.She was beaming whenever he saw her, obviously happy with her new life and challenges.She would tell him all the unique experiences she had, and he would sometimes feel a pang of jealousy that he wasn't there to be the source of her happiness anymore.

The phone calls and letters started to die down.Squall realized he didn't miss her as much as he thought he would.She was most likely feeling the same way.Now even when they did have time off, something else prioritized them from getting together as often as they had said they would in the beginning.

But they both saw this coming.It was sad, but they knew this couldn't go on.In a way, he was feeling trapped but didn't know why.He still loved and cared about her.Then finally one day she came to visit him and her old friends, Quistis, Zell, Selphie, Irvine, at Garden.And the other reason for her visit was because she didn't want to handle this situation over the phone or by letter.She only planned on staying for the day.When she used to spend the night on her few previous visits since she moved, she stayed in Squall's room.But this final time, staying in his room would not be an option anymore.

Squall went to the docks in Balamb to pick her up.After their initial hug and 'how are you's', they drove quietly back to the Garden.She laughed and talked about old times with the others, but aside from that Squall could tell there was something on her mind.And he had a pretty good idea what it was.Things weren't what they used to be.

Evening came and it was time for him to drive her back to the docks so she could have plenty of time yet to catch her ferry back to Dollet.The drive was pure silence; no longer the comfortable kind they shared that night walking on the beach.Rinoa absently stared out her window, nervously playing with her hands in her lap.She still had to tell him.Now, before she went back to Dollet.She couldn't tell him earlier, it might have made everyone else feel awkward for the rest of the day.Plus she wished she could put this off.

Squall gripped the wheel tightly, just staring straight ahead as he drove._This silence is way too...quiet_.Well, duh, that's obviously synonymous, he thought._We didn't even spend any time **together** today.We pretended we were happy when we were all together as a group with the others.But now we do have time.Right now...and how are we spending it?Speechless, not saying a word, being ignorant.God, Rinoa, I don't want to see you ship off again, but at the same time I can't wait to drop you off and go back home._

"Let's park here on the outskirts and walk through town to the pier.We have time, right?" Rinoa asked.

"Sure," Squall parked the rental near the entrance to the town and they slowly walked into the calm village.Rinoa didn't want to just drive straight to the docks, tell him, and leave.By the extremely slow pace they were walking, it was as if he also knew this would be their last moment together before their lives split into separate paths.

They walked for a few minutes, again in--silence.Rinoa had her hands stuffed in her pockets, looking at the ground as she stepped.Squall glanced over at her._This is enough_.He abruptly stopped and placed a hand on his hip.After a few seconds, Rinoa didn't hear his footsteps next to her anymore.She turned to look at his blank face.

"I might as well say goodbye to you right here and walk back to the car," he said in frustration.

Rinoa couldn't bear to look him in the eyes."Squall...we have to talk," she said as she looked down again.

He stepped up to her."I know."

"Let's keep walking."They continued their very slow pace side by side."Squall..." After going through this in her mind a dozen times she still didn't know how to say it."We've been together for a couple years now."

_Ugh.Just get to the point.This is too awkward_.

"...And, I'm the only girlfriend you've ever had."

"...Yeah?"

"Well, don't you ever feel...trapped?Like you're missing out on other experiences?"

"......"

Rinoa stopped and looked up at him."Squall, I don't know if you realize it, but you're starting to resent me.Yes, you may still have feelings for me, but staying with me is restricting you.And as time goes on, it's just going to get worse."

"So, this is all me."

"No, it's not all you...It's me too."Rinoa looked down and began to walk again."Things aren't the same between us anymore."

"That's obvious."

"You know, the custom is every sorceress needs a knight, for peace of mind."She stopped her steps again, finding it hard to concentrate while watching where she was going.She turned to him and took his hand to show her sincerity.He didn't look at her."And Squall, you've been a wonderful knight--"

"But..." he cut her off.

"I also need... to be by myself, just me...also for peace of mind.We're only 19.I feel too young to settle down for the rest of my life."She paused to see how he was reacting."Please say you understand."

He finally looked at her, then away in the distance again.After a long pause he chuckled bitterly, "So that's what it is."

"I'm sorry--"

"No, I'm talking about me.You're... right," he sighed and looked into her eyes."Resentment?" and looked down again."That... actually makes sense."

Rinoa still held his hand and used her other to lift his chin to look at her again."Are you mad at me?" she asked shyly.

He slowly shook his head."No," and stared into her eyes one last time.He bent down to meet her lips, for closure.

**Author's Notes**For those of you who were hoping for a little more detail after that shower scene, don't worry.I waited to push the limits on this "R" rated fic 'til a little later on.


	2. Part 2

"--So, what do you think?" asked Zell.

"Huh?" Squall was brought back to the present of the jukebox playing in the background and smell of boos and cigarettes in the air.He didn't notice Zell had been chattering away during his reverie.Zell had the habit of jumping from one subject to another in a constant ramble.Now apparently his rambling had stopped and was awaiting Squall's opinion.

"If I take out that hottie Irvine set me up with on Friday in Deling, then I could still be with Rachel on Saturday night, and Sunday is the day of the women's swimming competition and I could check out--"

"I think you're taking over Irvine's identity," Squall answered.

"Well so, what's wrong with that?Now that he's a taken man someone's got to follow up where her left offffffwhoa!"Zell's eye followed a well-endowed blond as she took up a seat on the adjacent wall of the bar which was rapidly filling up with people."I'll be back!...Or maybe I won't be back!"

Squall just rolled his eyes and waved, "In that case, I'll see you tomorrow."_Or probably again in the next minute once she shrugs you off..._That left him alone again in his thoughts.He could still never stop thinking, especially when he was by himself.Now thinking about the work they accomplished that day: how Zell was going to juggle around his women this coming weekend, how this homemade brew was pretty damn good, how he should really check on his fish when he got back home...

"Hey, Joe, could you fill this with water please?Thanks."

_That voice...Hey, that sounds just like_...Though a few years had passed, that voice was unmistakable.Squall turned his head to the previously vacant spot Zell left next to him to see a young woman standing with a backpack slung over her shoulder, long black hair brought into a ponytail wearing dark-rimmed glasses, waiting for the bartender to return with her water bottle.She didn't seem to notice Squall in the stool right next to her.

"Rinoa...?"

The woman turned her head in the direction from where her named was spoken.It took only a second before her eyes widened, mouth dropped open, and a big grin formed on her face."Oh my God...Squall?Squall Leonhart?!" she spat out quickly.They looked each other up and down.She exclaimed another 'oh my God' and gave him a surprised look."You look so different!"She ran her thumb and forefinger from her upper lip down the sides of her mouth to her chin.

"Oh, this?" Squall did the same to his goatee."I've had that for awhile."

"And also this!"She touched the top of his head, resisting an urge to run her fingers through his once long hair that would get in his eyes, now only a couple inches the longest.

"Yeah, that got to be annoying eventually."He got a shiver as he felt the slight pressure her fingers pressed on his strands.

_But it was so sexy_, Rinoa wanted to say, but kept her mouth shut thinking that wouldn't really be an appropriate thing to say._What am I thinking_? Instead, she said, "And what happened to that jacket with the fluffy collar?" tugging on the simple sleek black leather coat that he now wore that went down to his thighs.

"Fire hazard.That 'fluffy' collar started on fire once.Besides, I think this one makes me look more sophisticated."

Rinoa giggled._You look 30 instead of 22_.

Squall continued, "Hey, I'm not the only one with the change of appearance," pointing to her glasses.

"Yeah, found out I'm a little near-sighted."She covered her face with her hand."I look awful." She was wearing simple casual clothing, hair gathered into a scrunchy, no make-up and her dark glasses.But not for long.This was the way she always arrived here before she got ready.

She wanted the attention off her."So, what are you doing in Dollet?"

"Here with Zell on work."He looked over at where he chased over to the blond who was, surprisingly, still engaged in conversation with.

"Hmm, still command SeeD I take it?"

"You got it.Well, pay is good.Took a break from the desk part of it to make sure I keep in shape with all the others who do the field work on a regular basis."

"You like to be right there in the action every once in awhile, huh?"Rinoa noticed how broader his chest was.Actually, his whole body.Apparently, maturity and age filled in his skinny boyish figure she remembered.She spotted the watch on his wrist."Oh, God!I gotta go!"

Squall felt a slight disappointment.Reading his mind, Rinoa explained, "I sort of work here." Then added excitedly, "Are you staying for the show?"

"Show...?"

"Please say you'll stay for the show!"And with that ending statement she disappeared.

Squall turned back to his drink.All his previous thoughts earlier about today's job, Zell's hectic love schedule, (and the state of his fish) replaced with new curiosity about Rinoa._Go figure.The first time I'm back here since we broke up, I see her.She works here?!I shouldn't stay much longer, it feels awkward.But there's so many things I want to find out.Does she still attend school?What's she been doing with her life?_"Why do I care?" he asked out loud.Unfortunately, the bartender heard him and gave him a funny look, then dismissed it.He saw all sorts in his line of work.Squall, feeling foolish, held up his glass and said, "Can I just get another one of these please?"

"Hey, man!Cindy over there says she's got a friend who's really hot and she's sure that she would like to meet ya'!What do you say the four of us--" Zell shouted in Squall's ear after coming back from meeting the blond.

"Why are you shouting?!"Squall placed his hands over his recovering ears.

"I'm excited!"

He glanced over at the blond Zell was talking to, "I bet you are."

"Yeah!So let's mosy on outta here--"

"Mosy?!Ok, I wasn't kidding when I said you really **are** taking over Irvine's identity.But sorry.I can't leave just yet.I should, but I feel compelled to stay.Besides, she asked me to stay for the show."

"Show?**She**?Wow, you work faster than me!Give me some pointers!"

"Whatever.No, while you were over there with Sandy--"

"Cindy."

"Whatever!I bumped into Rinoa."

"Whoa!Rinoa's here?!Where?Where?I wanna go talk to her!How is she?I can't wait to catch up on things with her!"

"I thought your mind was preoccupied with Suzy."

"Cindy.Uh...well...But it'd be so cool to visit with Rinoa again, you know?It would be just like old times!"

Squall was relieved that at least his friend's mind wasn't continuously controlled by the new lust of chasing women."We didn't get to talk much.She said she works here."

Zell looked around."What, is she a waitress or something?"

"She didn't say."

A barmaid came up to the two men and asked, "Excuse me, are you Squall Leonhart and Zell Dincht?"

They looked at each other.Zell asked suspiciously, "Who wants to know?"

"There's a table reserved for you right in front by the stage.I was asked to invite you two to sit down."

The two men looked at each other again and shrugged."Why don't you go sit down and I'll explain to Cindy the circumstances," Zell said.

"And while you're at it, find out **her** circumstances," Squall motioned to the blond woman who was now flirting with someone else, apparently forgetting all about Zell.

"Wha!...Aw man," Zell trailed off.

Squall smirked and pushed him in the direction of their empty reserved table."She wasn't your type anyway."

"Parts of her were," he pouted.

They each pulled up a chair.Approximately eight small round tables each with a candle jar as a centerpiece were assembled near the rear of the pub, away from the hustle and bustle by the bar.A medium-sized platform was built into the corner with large speakers on the side.A microphone stood in the front center, piano along with a few various instruments tucked in the back.

Zell spoke up, "I didn't even notice this setup back here.Hey, did you see that sign when we first walked in?It said something about Tuesday's--Amateur Night blah blah blah..."

"That must be the show she was talking about."

"Think it was Rinoa who got us this table?"

A sparkly blue curtain closed around the stage.Squall looked around and saw more people from the bar gathering by the tables.An MC hopped up to the microphone.

"Good evening, folks!Is everyone psyched?We got some real talent here tonight.So sit back and enjoy the music!"The crowd of regulars and friends of the performers shouted and applauded."As always, every Tuesday night we open it up with a number from our very own...Angel Wing!"The lights dimmed and curtains opened.The drab woman Squall encountered at the bar no longer wore a simple ponytail and glasses.

A man at the piano started to play.Rinoa stepped up to the microphone, donning a long sleek black dress that followed her curves.It was held up by a pair of spaghetti straps, with tiny embroidered flowers lining the wide V-neck across her bosom.Her hair was drawn back and gathered into a pile on top of her head.Glasses were gone.Dramatic heavy makeup was applied to enhance her facial features.

Right away she noticed the two men sitting at the table she set aside for them, happy that Squall took her up on her offer.She flashed a quick smile at them and Zell waved back, trying to contain his excitement.She wanted to laugh; he apparently still had loads of energy.The piano played its first few introductory measures, and Rinoa started to sing her classic number for tonight, "Crazy" by Patsy Cline.

Zell looked over at Squall.Squall just kept his eyes fixed on the woman who was singing her heart out, occasionally looking their way as she made eye contact with the crowd.

_'Angel Wing'?!She looks completely different from when I saw her at the bar._

_ _

_"I sort of work here..."_

_ _

_So that's what she meant...She's a performer?Is this what she does now?What happened to her getting that degree she wanted?The thing that she left **me** to pursue? _But he knew that wasn't the real reason for their separation those years ago.That was just a catalyst for the inevitable.

When she reached midsong, Rinoa took the mike out of the stand and walked down the steps off the stage to work her way with crowd, approaching the table where the two men sat.She continued singing, now at the bridge of the song.

First she came up on Zell's side."...Worry, why do I let myself...worry..." pinching a couple ends of his pointy locks between her thumb and finger.He replied with a silly grin stretched out across his face, flattered by her attention.

She continued on to Squall."...Wonderin'...," placing her hand on one of his shoulders and slowly dragging it across his back to the other side."...what in the world did I do-ohh-ohh?"

She turned to face him, sliding her finger down to the tip of his nose as she bridged that last line to the beginning of the next verse, allowing her voice to crackle slightly, 

".....ohhh, Crazy...."She then went back onto the stage to complete the rest of the song.

"Crazy for looovin'...yyoooouuuuu....."As she held out her last note, the blue curtain closed and the crowd hooted and applauded.

Zell turned to Squall with amazement in his eyes."Did you see that!!?I never expected to see this when we came here tonight!She was great! And she really knows how to involve her audience.I think she was flirting with you!I mean, that thing she did with your nose--"

"I need to get some fresh air," Squall interrupted.He grabbed his leather coat and headed for the door with no explanation.

Zell knew to just let him go.This happened every so often.Obviously his friend wanted to be alone to sort through his thoughts.Zell watched the next performer attempt to do an Elvis impersonation.When he finished, Zell reluctantly applauded with the rest to be polite, although he wished he had a tomato.

"Zell!"Rinoa scurried over to the table where Zell sat alone and grabbed a chair.She had her hair down, glasses and street clothes back on, but all her glamorous makeup remained.

"Hey!You were great!What, are you all done now?" he gestured to her appearance.

"Yeah.I only do the opening number," she answered and looked around.

"Wow!You were a total fox up there!--I mean, you still are now even without the dress--ur...I mean, not like I'm checking you out or anything..." he rolled his eyes, trying to find a way to get his foot out of his mouth.

Rinoa laughed."Don't worry.I know what you meant... Um, I don't mean to change the subject, but where did Squall go?"She scanned the room again.

"Oh, I think he went outside.He mumbled something about fresh air," he shrugged.

Rinoa looked away sadly."Oh."

"You...want to go talk to him?He's been out there long enough by himself.I think it's time he got a little company."

"I'm sorry.Do you mind?"Rinoa felt guilty abandoning him after only chatting for a few minutes.

"Nah, go ahead.I've got lots to entertain me here," looking back at the stage where the next amateur was getting ready with his...banjo?

Squall lit a cigarette and leaned back on the brick wall of the pub, some feet away from the door and commotion.He stared into the darkness above him._Why did I find the need to bail out of there?Why do I feel this sense of anxiety?_He sighed.Things used to be so easy when he chose **not** to feel._No, that's absolutely wrong.I was a mess back then._

He closed his eyes and took a puff.He opened them again to watch the smoke slowly leave his mouth.He had absolutely no reason or desire to smoke.He wasn't addicted, just liked how the act of doing it distracted him from when he got too lost in his mind.He was careful not to light up often, or it would become a habit.

"Since when do you smoke?"

The woman's voice threw him off guard and the rest of the smoke he was blowing out went right back up his nostrils and made him cough.

Rinoa giggled."Sorry.Did I surprise you?"

Squall threw the perfectly good cigarette to the ground and stomped it out."I don't.I, ah...just once in awhile..."

"Just one of those 'need-something-for-my-body-to-do-while-my-mind-won't-shut-up' things?"

_Exactly.How can she still know me after all this time?_But instead he answered,

"Whatever," they spoke in unison.Rinoa laughed again.In the beginning, that would annoy him to the fullest when someone could read him like that.But now, he couldn't help but laugh with her.

Glad to see he wasn't out here because of anger or something similar towards her, she said, "I'm glad **some** things haven't changed."

They stood there a bit, awkward._Why did I have to get rid of that cigarette?It could be giving me something to do right now instead of standing like a moron.I feel like Laguna._At least he thought of something to say.

"You look like you're getting ready to leave already."

Rinoa pointed to the backpack slung again over her shoulder."Well, I can't stay here all night.I've got some studying I want to do."

"Studying?That's great.You're going for that degree in psychology still then?"

"Yes.You remembered!"

Squall shrugged."Hasn't been that long."

"Long enough."

Another bit of silence between the two.

"I suppose you assumed I dropped out and became a full-time entertainer or something when you saw me tonight."

_Man, she **does** know me!_He looked up guiltily."The thought did cross my mind, yes.I mean, you say you work here, you've got your own stage name, you do a damn good performance, and everyone jeers like you're the hottest ticket in town."He let a smile show through, thinking back to when she visited Zell's and his table.

"Well, actually I only sing here once a week, that 'once' being every Tuesday for the opening of the show.Regularly, I'm a part-time barmaid here.I've gotta pay for my tuition somehow."

It was slowly sinking in for Squall."....Angel Wing?Your limit break is now your stage name?"

Rinoa looked up, reminiscing, "Ah, limit breaks.I haven't used those for a long time.I no longer fight.But I like to keep that identity separate from my own.I don't want everyone there to know me as just 'Rinoa Heartilly.'For one thing, I don't want to use the fame off my mother, and if people do talk about me, it doesn't drift into my student and personal life.When I was first approached to do this weekly thing, I hesitated.But it's a fun break from the norm, you know, being in classes all day, then going to work at night.It allows me to show my...I guess out-going 'crazy' side of myself."

"Do you get any different treatment with people around here knowing you're a sorceress?"

She put a finger to her lips."No one here knows I am.And I'd rather it stay that way."Squall understood.No matter how far she was from ever being considered as 'evil', people still tended to fear the higher power, and that knowledge could be used against her.

Squall started to fidget.They were having a nice conversation, but he wished they were doing something, like being by the bar again inside.Then he remembered she wanted to study yet."I suppose...you wanna get going so you can still study--"

Rinoa seemed disappointed."Well, I'm not in a hurry if you're not.There's so much I wanna catch up on!Like, how is everyone!?"

Squall wanted to keep talking also--for a change."Did you wanna go back in there?" pointing back to the pub.

"No, it's too noisy in there.Let's take a walk.I have to eventually get back to my apartment anyway."

"You walk to and from here every night you work?Isn't it dangerous this late at night?"

Rinoa smirked."I said I no longer fight, but I still know how to protect myself if I have to...Why, are those old instincts of knighthood kicking in?"

"No..." Squall quickly defended._Why would she think that_?"It just doesn't seem like a safe thing for a woman all by herself to be walking the streets real late."He raised an eyebrow."No matter how well she is in combat."

"Then accompany me.I have a new place since you were last here.I only live a few blocks away."

Squall thought about it for a second.He didn't feel like spending the rest of the night at a bar anyway."Let me go and tell Zell we're leaving.Maybe he'll want to tag along, I know he was eager to talk to you again."

He went back into _Shining Bomber_ where the show was still going on in the back, but the table where they used to sit was empty.Instead, he found his friend at the bar once again, apparently trying to coax the attention of that same blond woman, Sissy, Sally, whatever her name was._He must have gotten bored with the show._Squall took another glance at the current performer._I don't blame him_.

"Hey, I'm outta here.I'm walking Rinoa home and then going back to the hotel.Do you wanna come?"

Zell leaned in."I'm sorta gettin' acquainted with Cindy better, if you know what I mean!"

The blond woman, now a little inebriated, threw her arms around Zell and hung on him."Besides," he smiled, "I wouldn't want to interfere with anything," and turned back to the woman clinging to him.

_What did he mean by that?There's nothing to interfere **with**_.

Squall went back outside where Rinoa was waiting."He's..." _trying to score with some chick_, "...preoccupied with a woman he just met," he smirked.

"Just as well.Come, I live this way," they crossed the street and headed down a quiet sideroad."So, how long you guys in town?"

"Couple more days.We leave on Thursday to go back to Garden."

"Must not be an extremely huge mission if only you two were sent here."

"No, it's pretty boring really.There have been an unusual number of Anacondaurs roaming around the countryside right outside Dollet's city limits.So we were hired to find the excessive nests and exterminate them.The reason SeeD was called in was because of the high danger risk of the possible parent being there and then wanting to exterminate us instead."

"Hmm, that actually sounds kind of fun."

"Sounds like I'm not the only one who misses being in the action from time to time too?Actually, you'd probably rather read their heads."

Rinoa laughed."No, I'm not into monster psychology.The human mind is much more complex and interesting," she poked the side of his head with her finger.

They left the business district and entered a residential area.Rinoa changed the subject, "So, you haven't told me yet!What's going on in everyone's lives?"

"Uh, let's see.Quistis recently became the ambassador for Balamb Garden.She was always good at delegating and being involved with politics.Zell, if you haven't noticed is living up the bachelor life.He's still one of our best fighters; he never seems to tire out.And as for Irvine and Selphie, you're never going to believe this one."

Rinoa looked at him in anticipation."What!?Tell me!"

"Irvine's proposed to Selphie and the two are planning on getting married soon."

Rinoa's mouth dropped open and she clapped her hands."Irvine!?I didn't think he was the kind to ever settle down.But that's great!"

"Guess he just grew up.And I'm sure he didn't want to play the role of the 'lonely gunman' for the rest of his life either."

"Oh, God.It's not because Selphie's pregnant or anything like that, is she?"

That made Squall laugh, picturing Selphie always bouncing up and down, but having to hold a swollen stomach."No, it's nothing like that.They're both really committed to each other."

"You know, I keep forgetting that time has passed and everyone has changed with it.I keep picturing everything to be the same way as when I left."She paused."Well, I see Laguna is still President of Esthar.How are things between you and him?" remembering that it wasn't the easiest of transitions for Squall when he found out.

"My father's doing fine.I still don't call him 'dad' when I speak to him, and I probably never will.But at least it's not that awkward when I have to be around him like it used to be.Of course, it helps when Sis is there."

"Yes!How is Ellone?"

"She's eager to start her own family."

"Ooh!You could be an uncle!"

"Not quite.She says she has to find the right man first."

"Yes, I suppose that's a prerequisite to starting a family in the first place," she joked."Speaking of finding the right person...you haven't said anything about yourself yet.I mean, for all I know, you could be married with your own family right now."

"Me!?Married?I don't think so."

"Why does the possibility seem so preposterous?"

"I don't know.It's just that...well...I can't picture myself actually marrying anyone I've dated recently...I don't know."He scratched his head."I guess, like Sis, I would also have to find the right person before doing something like that."He quickly added, "Not like I'm out there looking and waiting for her to pop out."

He wanted to change the subject."But I do have a fish."

Rinoa giggled."Hehe, you have a fish?Just one?Doesn't he get lonely?"

"Nah, he's a lot like me.He likes to be by himself."

"But surely he needs some companionship once in awhile...just like you.Pets, like people, no matter how independent they are, need others to function better, to have someone acknowledge their existence and make them feel loved."

Squall gave her a strange look."I thought you said you weren't into animal psychology."

She was laughing even more now."Well, okay.I admit I don't know the details on how they think, especially a fish for that matter."

"But you're right about him having to depend on someone other than himself.I haven't been checking on him lately.In fact, I don't even know if he **is** still 'functioning'."

At this point, Rinoa burst out into full-blown laughter.

"Why are you laughing!?" his brow creased and he kept a serious face.

Rinoa contained her giggles, forced a sympathetic frown and looked up at him."I'm sorry..."Two seconds after she apologized, the corners of her mouth turned up again and laughter spilled out.She had to look away.

"You think the slow demise of my fish is funny?"A smile crept through his stern expression.

She looked at him again."No, it's just the idea of you, Squall Leonhart, the brave lone wolf who used to think he didn't need anything or anyone else to survive, obtains a pet--and then forgets about it..."She could tell he was trying not to laugh also."See!You think it's funny too!" pointing her finger at him.

"No, I don't..."Although he couldn't contain his brewing laughter anymore.

"Okay, then why **are** you laughing?"

"Ha, ha, ha...I don't know.I think you're making me."

"Glad I can have that effect on you.That's where I live," pointing to a building complex around the corner.She saw a familiar car in the parking lot and immediately stopped."Oh, shoot.He must be waiting for me."

"Who?"

"His name is Neil.He's my boyfriend.That's his car in the lot."

Those words shocked him."Um, I don't think he's gonna like seeing his girlfriend out here walking with a complete male stranger."

"He's not going to see.Let's turn back."She took his arm and they walked back in the direction of the pub.

Squall was confused."Why are you coming back with me?It's fine.I'll leave now, you stay here, walk up to your place by yourself, and he'll never see me--"

"I don't feel like seeing him right now.He's going to ask how my evening was and I don't have the courage right now to lie to him again."

He was confused more now than before."Why would you be--"

She cut him off again."He doesn't know I do this 'Angel Wing' thing on Tuesday's.I always tell him I go and study with a girlfriend of mine."She looked back to her apartment."And don't ask me why, because I don't know myself.We've been starting to get serious and I think I'm just not sure how he would react."

Squall was silent for a few moments._I never pictured her as being with another man.Why not?I've had girlfriends since her.Of course she has the right to move on also.I guess, just like she said earlier, we forget that time has passed and everyone has changed with it._He was curious about something.

"You mentioned that nobody here knows about your sorceress powers...You never told him either, did you?"

Rinoa replied sadly, "No, he doesn't know about that either."

"Well, how can you expect to have a serious relationship with him if you're only half-honest about yourself?"

She was beginning to feel agitated."Excuse me, but who are you to judge about honesty?!When you and I first met, you were always dishonest to yourself, denying how you felt, keeping certain things inside you and not telling others what was really on your mind--"

He stopped and turned to her.That hurt him.Sure, that's how he was **when they first met**.He could have just blown off that comment and kept his rising anger to himself pretending it didn't affect him, but then that would have proved that what she just said was true."Look, I'm pertaining to being honest **in a relationship**!I know that's how I used to be, but when I realized how much you meant to me and I almost lost you during that whole Ultimecia crap...**you** changed me, Rinoa.It was because of you I started to open up and trust others.It didn't happen overnight, but I sure learned a lot from it.So I think I know what I'm talking about when it comes to being truthful to the one I love!"

He turned forward and began to walk again, fuming."I'm sorry I brought it up.You live your life the way you want to.It's none of my business."He kept his eyes fixed straight ahead.

Rinoa remained standing in the spot of their argument.She felt a lump in her throat as she watched him storm away._Oh, God.He's right.He's absolutely right.I actually do respect your opinion, Squall.Wait!_

Squall walked even faster.He was furious._How can she accuse me--after how different I am from way back then-- She's the one with the problem now, not me--Ugh!Sometimes she makes me so angry!..._

"Wait!" she called and ran up to him.

_Just keep walking.Don't look at her.Ignore her while you still can_.

"Squall, you're right.You're right!I didn't want to face the truth.I'm sorry for snapping at you."

_Whatever_."......"

Rinoa kept looking at his face, trying to keep up."I'm sorry I upset you!You know how stubborn I get and don't want to admit when you're right and I'm wrong.Please, I don't want our visit to end like this!I don't want us to be pissed off at each other and let another three years go by."

Squall still showed nothing.But inside her words were diffusing his anger.

"God, Squall.Your thoughts mean a lot to me.I really do value your opinion!"_Don't just leave!Ugh!Sometimes he makes me so angry!..._

Finally, he stopped.He looked at her pleading eyes and reluctantly gave in, "I don't want us to go away mad at each other either."

"Oh, thank you!" and threw her arms around his neck in a tight hug.

"Whoa!"This was the first they embraced since they were reunited.Despite her current boyfriend and their long-gone argument, he welcomed her warmth and returned the gesture.

"You know, I wanted to do this when we first bumped into each other at the pub," she said against his shoulder.

They let go and continued walking."So what are you going to do now, since you're avoiding Neil?" Squall asked.

Rinoa thought she caught the hint of his name being overly emphasized, but wasn't sure.She sighed, "I don't know.What are you doing?"

"Well, originally I was planning on going back to the hotel and calling it a day after walking you home."

"Maybe I should just get a room there too for tonight."

"Don't you think Neil's eventually going to get worried?"

"No, it'll just look like I either pulled an all-nighter or fell asleep at that friend's house.Which actually has happened before, so he shouldn't question it...so maybe I'm not really 'lying'..."

"Yeah, right.And maybe you're not 'lying' to yourself right now either."Immediately after saying that, he wished he hadn't.He was prepared for another fight, but instead she rested her head sideways on his shoulder as they walked.He felt like he should apologize."I'm sorry.I shouldn't have said that."

She raised her head back into position."No, that's okay.Remember, I said I respect what you have to say."

They were back on the main street at _Shining Bomber_ again.They continued on, past the junk shop _Nautilus_ up to the large beautiful lit up water fountain in the center of the city.They opened the big wooden doors to the hotel.

"I'll wait for you to make sure you can still get a room," Squall said.

Rinoa stepped up to the receptionist."That will be 100 gil, please."Rinoa rummaged through her backpack to find only a mere 50."Dammit," she muttered under her breath.

Squall waited in the lobby.Wondering what was taking so long, he glanced back at the desk to see Rinoa pleading with the receptionist.When she realized she wasn't going to get anywhere by trying to make a deal, she slumped back to Squall waiting for her.

"I guess I'm going back home again."

"No vacancies?"

"No, I don't have enough gil."She looked like she was about to cry.

Squall whipped out his wallet.She quickly shoved it away."I'm not gonna take your money."

"But I can tell you really don't want to go back and face Neil either."

She put a hand to her forehead, stealing Squall's signature move."No, not tonight."

He stuffed his wallet back in his pants."Look, do you want to stay in my room tonight?"

She sighed."I don't want to impose."

"Nonsense.Let me do you this favor."

"Do you think Zell will mind?"

"No, he's got his own room."

"Oh, you don't have to share one anymore?"

"Costs us more, but it's worth it.He may be my best friend...but at times he drives me crazy!"

Rinoa laughed for the first time since they reached her apartment."I suppose he prefers it that way too, since you told me he's into the bachelor life!"

"Hey, come to think of it, it **was** his idea in the first place!"Realization dawned on Squall's features.He simply shook his head and rolled his eyes."It's this way."

Squall led her down the hall to his room.He unlocked the door and turned on the light.Rinoa set down her backpack on the desk.Sitting on the edge of the bed he took his boots off."You know, he probably knows you are one anyway."

Rinoa looked at him."Huh?"

"Neil.He's probably figured out you're a sorceress."

"How?What do you mean?"She sat down on the edge with him, Indian-style.

_This is going to be weird.But she has to know, for her own sake_."Well...I assume you've slept with him?"

Her eyes widened.She didn't know where he was going with this."....Yes.Go on."

"Um...well, when you make love, Rinoa, sometimes you emit this...aura, this energy.I didn't realize it until long after we broke up, when I noticed it wasn't happening with any one else I was with.You didn't do this in the beginning, but it seemed like once we were more...I don't know, established, that's when it started.And was more intense, the better the...well, anyway.My point is I figured it must be due to the fact that you're a sorceress."

Rinoa stared into space, thinking about what he said."Really?If you said it didn't start until we were more...used to it, and was stronger the better it was...Squall, I was probably just having an or--"

"No, it was more than that.It...I don't know how to explain.This, wave of energy, like I said flows from you and...it wasn't just physical.More like...it went right in and found my spirit...urm, this feels very strange discussing this--"

"I think I know what you mean...I do remember, and I felt it too."She stopped staring at the wall and looked back at him again."But I know for sure I haven't felt it since.Even with Neil, no matter how great some of our encounters were--"

Squall cleared his throat.He really didn't want her to start going into detail about her new sex life.

"--so, it can't just simply be because I'm a sorceress.It must be more selective.We need to narrow it down more...maybe it's a 'sorceress-knight' thing?"

They just started at each other for a couple seconds.Breaking the silence, they turned away and both spoke at the same time.

"Who knows?"

"There could be 100 explanations..."

They both got off the bed.Squall headed to the comfy chair next to it.

"No, I'll sleep in the chair," Rinoa said.

"No, it's okay, you have the bed."

"This is your room.You paid for it.I'm just tagging along.**I'll** take the chair."With that, she raced over to it before he had a chance to retort."See, look!It reclines!" playing with the lever to try to convince him to keep the bed.

"Don't you have to study yet?"

"Oh, yeah.Um, could you hand me my pack please?It's just I'm so comfy in this chair and I don't wanna get up--"

"No," he stated with a hand on his hip and a small smile on his face."I'm too busy getting settled in this nice soft cozy bed that I'm forced to sleep in."He pulled back the covers and started to crawl in.

"Hmph!Meanie," she got up to get her books.With her back turned, Squall dashed out of the bed and took over the chair.

"Hey!" Rinoa exclaimed, ran back to the chair and tried to hit him with a hardcover book.He held up his arms in a defensive manner, trying to fend off her blows, laughing."I'm supposed to be the stubborn one here!" she said.

Squall seized the weapon from her and tossed it gently to the bed.She continued to wrestle with him, tugging on his arms to pull him up.But she was laughing too hard, which didn't allow her to use all her strength, always falling back.

"And don't even think about using that sorceress mumbo jumbo on me either!" Squall said.

Rinoa stood back, stretched her arms out in front of her in a mock trance, "I command you to release power of the chair."

Squall looked around him."Uh...I'm still here."

Finally she gave up.Squall, realizing this, said, "Now hand me a blanket."

"What?!No way!"She crossed her arms across her chest."You wouldn't get me what I wanted when I was sitting there!You'll have to get it yourself."She tapped one foot on the floor.

He reached for the bedspread on the bed a few feet from where he sat.Leaning over, but still trying to keep attached to the chair, he stretched as far as he could and got ahold of the blanket.Rinoa, seeing her opportunity, lunged to the half-open space on the side of the chair that he wasn't using while he stretched.She lodged in her knee to prevent him from rolling back on, trying to pry her hands underneath his body to push him out.

"Come...on...get...out--" she grunted as she laughed.Squall let go of his hold on the blanket to push off the chair's arm to steady himself.Still, to no avail, she could not push him out.

Looking at their position, she thought of one more thing."I guess this calls for the cuchi-coo treatment!"

_No!Anything but that!_Rinoa was the only one who ever found his ticklish spots.She dug into his side, laughter turning evil, simultaneously pushing him off with her other hand.

"No!...Stop!" he gasped between fits of laughter.He was now completely vulnerable."Aaaagghhh!" he shouted as he fell to the floor.He lay there, still laughing; Rinoa giggled as she settled back into her reclaimed possession.

Finally he stood, stating matter-of-factly, "You still don't have your book."

Rinoa slapped her forehead.She quickly put on a pouty face, batted her eyelashes, and with the sweetest voice possible said, "Sqquaaaallll?Could you do me a faaavooor..."

He rolled his eyes, handed her the book, and threw the bedspread that was already half-off over her head.

"Thnkk yugh..." she muffled from underneath the covers, keeping the same sweet tone.

He headed to the bathroom to brush his teeth._Who would have thought tonight would have turned out like this?We've quickly become reacquainted, acting as if we were never apart...well, except the fact that she's with someone else._He cleaned up his mouth and looked into the mirror._Still, I feel completely comfortable around her, nonetheless._

He exited the bathroom and found Rinoa tucked in the blanket reading her textbook, glasses on the nightstand._I forgot how beautiful she was_.His mind quickly flashed to her singing performance, then to when she told him about her current boyfriend.He shook his head and ran a hand through his short hair._Whoa.I shouldn't be thinking things like that._

He climbed into his bed, put an arm behind his head, and faced the ceiling.Rinoa slapped her book shut.Squall turned her way."Done already?!"

She sighed."I can't concentrate.Too many things have happened tonight."She gazed out the window."My mind is far from school right now."She turned to face Squall laying in his bed."You know, the last time I was in this hotel was when I was with you guys. And we stayed here while we were leveling up before breaking into Lunatic Pandora."

"Seems like yesterday."

"Those were some exciting times.Remember when we helped that artist with his painting, and you beat my boss at cards.Well, my future boss at that time.And those two kids playing hide-and-seek and one was hiding too long and wet his shorts?!That was so cute!Oh!And when that guard fell asleep and we snuck past and headed to the communication tower--"

Squall sat up."And a Galbadian soldier stopped us, ordered one of those Robotechs at us, which ended up sliding off the edge--"He started to laugh again for the umpteenth time that night and had to catch his breath.

Rinoa was also laughing heartily (no pun intended)."So they sent a second one which was busted!"

They were both doubled up in laughter.Squall continued, "And the lady at the pub who wasn't really a 'woman'?!Remember her?"

"Yes!She, or he, rather, still stops in from time to time!When he's in drag he likes to be called 'Cindy'."

"Ha, ha, ha!Really?I can't believe--" he suddenly stopped, his eyes widened."Blond?Big ti--...chest?"he inquired.Rinoa nodded.

He threw his head back in hysterical laughter."Well, he sure fooled me tonight but Zell is in for a **big** surprise!"

"Huh?"

"That's the 'woman' he was hitting on all night, and again when I went back in to ask if he wanted to walk with us."He shook his head in disbelief.

"Oh, my God," is all she could say.She covered her face with her hand and started to giggle.Once their laughter died down, she said, "I've never heard you laugh so many times like this in one day, one **night** actually."

Squall stared at her for a moment, thinking."Neither have I."

"You mean you're not usually like this?"

He looked at her shocked."You kidding?You know me."

"I know, but that part of you could have changed.It's been awhile."

"Hasn't been that long."

"Long enough."

The two stared at each other in silence.Squall spoke, "Didn't we have this conversation already?"

Rinoa gazed at him before getting out of her chair to sit right next to where he still sat up in bed.She raised her hand and slowly caressed his cheek, down to the groomed stubble on his chin."Do you want to test that theory?"

The surprise and warmth from her hand on his face sent shivers down his spine.He eyed her curiously."What theory?"

She remained focused on those blue eyes she remembered so well and spoke softly, "The one about the aura...?I want to feel it again."

Squall's heart skipped a beat._With you, Rinoa, yes.Oh, yes...No_!"Wh-what about Neil?I thought you were seri--"

She broke off his sentence."You said so yourself, how can our relationship be considered serious if I'm not even letting him know who I really am?" 

Her hand still resting on his cheek, she gently guided his face closer to hers.He closed his eyes, letting himself fall into the weakness._I would love to be with you again...But I can't let my emotions take over.I can't let myself get involved._Eyes still closed, he took her arms and pushed her away.

"Still, Rinoa, you belong to another man," opening his eyes.

"I don't 'belong' to anyone," she said independently."I decided I will take the bed after all...but I would like you to be in it."

She leaned in closer to him again, this time he didn't resist._I do want you, Rinoa.God, do I want you.Ok, it'll just be a physical thing.It's not going to mean anything.It's not going to mean anything.It's not going to--_

His thoughts died as their lips met and time ceased in that moment.All they felt was the presence of each other.Rinoa was the first to pull away."I always wondered what it would feel like to kiss a man with facial hair."

"What did it feel like?"

Rinoa smiled."Kinda tickles my nose."

He grinned with a twinge of mischief, "Do you want me to show you what else it can tickle?"

She matched his grin and reached over to turn out the light.

This time it was Squall who took the initiative. He pulled his refound beauty into his arms and cocked his head with his mouth half open.In the dark he searched for her lips with his own.When he found them he took her bottom lip and gently tugged on it with his mouth.Each time this became more deep and passionate than the first.They both knew this wasn't morally right, but something about it definitely was.

Rinoa, going crazy with what Squall was doing to her in his simple kisses, pulled upwards on his black T-shirt.He backed away from her face slightly to allow her to finish what she was trying to do.As the neck of the shirt passed over his head, Rinoa confirmed the change she saw of his chest when she first saw him in the bar.It definitely had broadened over these past couple years.She dreamily eyed the contours of his muscles that the streetlights shone on through the slots in the blinds.Licking her lips, she dove for his mouth, wanting him to drive her crazy again.

And that he did.They worked up a frenzy of passion and allowed their curious hands to re-explore what became familiar to them once upon a time.He pulled out her ponytail and saw how long her hair had become.He buried his face in her fallen locks, faintly smelling the small hint of smoke from being at the pub, and brushed his lips past her ear.Soon the rest of their clothing made contact with the floor, piece by piece.

Still in a facing sitting position they wrapped their legs behind the other's torso.Primitive instincts drawing nearer, they took turns nibbling each other's necks, wanting to devour every square inch.Every part of Rinoa's body responded as Squall leaned closer and straightened his legs so they were now behind him.He hovered over her as his kisses trailed down the length of her body.

Rinoa couldn't resist to tangle her fingers through his short hair as he proceeded lower and lower.She let out a moan when he reached his destination.In a husky voice she asked, "Is this what you meant by showing me what else your goatee can tickle?"

In response, Squall lightly chuckled and made one extremely long stroke with his tongue that nearly shot Rinoa threw the roof.His hands remained on her thighs at first while she moved beneath him.He could hear her short rapid breaths and looked up from time to time to watch her reactions.She tossed her head from side to side, "Squall..."

He picked up his pace and put his fingers to work also.He wanted her so bad it hurt, but remained patient, wanting her to receive as much pleasure as possible.

"It's...I can feel it...it's getting nearer," Rinoa gasped between breaths.She arched her back and pressed her head against the pillow.

Squall groaned, sending a vibration through her that sent her over the edge.Just as her body began to tremble, a warm energy that felt like sunshine enveloped her and its chosen lover, combining the two souls into another state of existence.

When they returned to reality, Rinoa sat up and gently pushed Squall down so his head was at the foot of the bed.His eyes rolled back as she began to return the favor.As much as he was enjoying this, he wanted to experience the aura again, and it wasn't going to happen like this.It had to come from her.

He touched her shoulders and pleaded, "Rinoa... please, I need to be inside you."Rinoa immediately obliged, for she was still quivering and wanted the same.She helped him up and they reversed positions.She lunged for his mouth despite the taste.

Knowing she was more than prepared, he decided to finally not hold back.With one quick motion, he sunk in his entire length and his jaw trembled.He proceeded with a slow rhythm that quickly picked up speed, encouraged by his lover and his built-up tension. Just when Rinoa didn't think her stamina could take much more, she found herself being pulled back in by the friction of Squall's methodical movements.More moans escaped her throat and her eyes settled on his, which were looking back at her.She could see everything in them, as did he; lust, longing, forgotten memories, and an unspoken understanding.Their souls were bare for the other to see; not just see, but to **feel**, experience.

Rinoa felt the warm sensation stirring and about to give way a second time tonight, but she never took her eyes off his.Squall was practically panting, his brow furrowed in concentration as he gazed into the endless depths of her pupils surrounded by that deep chocolate color.He waited for her to release and transport them to that place uncharted by anyone else.As she contracted around him, there was nothing that could have stopped his sudden burst of satisfaction.Rinoa still held his gaze as he shuddered within her.

********************************

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:All the events Squall and Rinoa are reminiscing like the painting, secondary events at the communication tower, kid peeing his pants, transvestite at pub, etc.. are actual events in the game if you go back and visit Dollet later on.


	3. Part 3

Rinoa placed her hand on the chest of the man lying next to her, feeling his rapid heartbeat slowly decreasing.She curled up close to him, twining her top leg into his as the last of the mysterious, yet familiar wave of energy wore off and brought them back into reality._How could I have not noticed this before?Squall had to point it out to me.Back then, I guess we thought it was normal, like everyone must have experienced it.But, no, this is definitely unique.Whatever it is, is exclusive to the two of us, but only when we're with each other.And it radiates from me._She stroked her palm along his breast plate, fingering the few strands of hair sprouting there.

_And Squall, you were so unselfish.You helped me achieve my peak not once, but twice tonight.My two to your one.Which further explains how this 'energy' starts from me and hangs onto you, since I felt it twice and I know you did also.You focused everything on giving **me** pleasure; perhaps, to get me reached to my fullest in hopes of intensifying this energy so that we could both bask in its magic?_

She wanted to tell him everything she was thinking, to share some realizations she was coming across with this fascinating...whatever it was.But she didn't.Their breathing and heartbeats now back to normal, she lay there in the quiet darkness and closed her eyes as Squall smoothed her hair and lulled her to sleep.

He felt calm as his fingers wove in-between the dark thick, silky strands._It still exists.It's got to be her powers.But then, why only me?_He turned his head to her shadowed face.Her features twitched slightly as phases of sleep took over her mind and body._Does this mean we were meant to be together?Or what?_He silently laughed to himself._So much for trying to keep a distance.Convincing myself before this happened that it 'wasn't going to mean anything, wasn't going to mean anything'... yeah, right._

Before his mind could keep him up any longer to dwell on the fact that she did still technically have a boyfriend and how this was going to affect everything--he opted to just enjoy the moment, like he had earlier, before the sun rose and a new day started.He, too, soon fell asleep in that position, with not a single word conversed from either's lips.

***********************************************

He stood at the spot where they had promised to meet long ago, holding abundle of hand-picked wildflowers.Rinoa took a left at the orphanage's entrance to look for him.She was delighted to find him there and waved, "Squall!"He turned at her voice and smiled shyly.It was the teenage version of him, smooth face, long bangs.

He thrust the bouquet to her."I'm so glad we found each other again."

"Rinoa!Hey, over here!" called another man's voice.She turned and saw Neil, her boyfriend.Apparently, she was now back in Dollet; they were standing outside the pub.She was dressed in her singing attire.He looked hurt."Why didn't you just tell me?You don't think I would have understood?Maybe not, I mean, look at what Adel and Edea did to the world..."

"Rinoa."She spun back towards Squall again.This time he had his present looks, leaning against the brick wall puffing on a cigarette."You can't leave me again.Not after what just happened.You leave me now, and I might regress back to my old self, not being able to deal with the pain of losing the one I depended on.I'll be cold, untrusting, and won't ever give a damn about anyone else's problems.Just as long as I survive.I'll live out the rest of my life believing I can take care of myself."

"Rinoa."Again she turned to Neil.He shot her a fierce glare."Feh.What a joke.Posing as some innocent schoolgirl while you have the power to rule the world.You're probably manipulating the instructors and all your so-called friends.Then you go and tease the men at some tavern, playing them up for affection... You're such a slut.You're only looking out for what suits **you** best."

"What?No--" she defended anxiously.

"Rinoa."Ugh, she was getting tired of the back and forth motion.She turned to Squall once more, who was now sitting up naked in the hotel bed they shared.He was holding the same fierce glare that she just witnessed on Neil's face.

"You used me?You pranced around in that getup tonight, seduced me and manipulated my actions just to satisfy your own desires.He's right.You are just a slut."

"No, I... I'm not a..."She looked down at the bouquet of wildflowers still in her hands and watched them crumble to dust.

*************************************************

Rinoa successfully forced open her eyes in an attempt to escape the nightmare.Her muscles were tense and her teeth hurt.She must have been gritting them, she thought.She looked around the room to make sure she was really awake, since the nightmare ended in the very room.

The lights were off, but it was still illuminated by the streetlights shining through the window.The clock read 2 am.Everything was where it should be: backpack on the desk, recliner unoccupied, and their clothes sprawled out on the floor.She glanced at the man still lying next to her, who was snoring slightly.

She thought about the taunts the two men spat at her._It was only a dream--for now.What about what happens next?I'm going to end up hurting someone's feelings sooner or later.What am I going to do?I wonder how Squall feels about all this.I want to ask him._She looked more at his sleeping form.He looked very relaxed, content.

_But I'm afraid to ask him.I don't even know how I feel about this!_She wanted to touch him, to reach out to him for an answer, but didn't want to wake him, especially after deciding what she had to do.

Very carefully she snuck out of bed and quietly gathered her things.Luckily with his snoring, she could easily tell if she was disturbing him or not.Once dressed, she grabbed the hotel stationery and wrote him an honest note.Making sure she had everything, she looked back sadly at her past lover.Tears welled up under her eyelids, but she forced them back.

"Please forgive me, Squall," she whispered.A small part of her wanted to speak louder, to 'accidentally' wake him so he could stop her."I just can't face you in the morning."

She fled the hotel and quickly walked to her apartment.Being the middle of the night, the cold November air went straight through her jacket, despite how warm it had been earlier that night.

Her backpack felt heavy and she was tired and confused. _There's no reversing what I just did.I can't go back, the door would be locked anyway.Maybe he'll be relieved that I left.Maybe that's all he wanted in the first place--or maybe not._She could no longer hold the tears back that were building since she left his room.She quickened her pace, not wanting to hang around outside so late and so vulnerable and off-guard.

By the time she arrived at her apartment, the tears on her cheeks had dried.Fiddling with the lock, she thought, I just want to curl up in my own bed and not deal with this anymore tonight.When she opened the door, the living room light was already on and a groggy-looking college boy sat up from the couch.

_Oh, shit._"Neil!Wh-what are you doing here this late?"

He scratched his head and rubbed his eyes."I was waiting for you to arrive and I must have fallen asleep.Hope you don't mind I let myself in with the spare key you gave me.It was cold sitting in the car."He yawned."What time is it anyway?"

"About 2:30."

"Long study session?Did you walk here just now?Babe, why didn't you just stay at your friend's place?It's dangerous for a woman all by herself to be walking the streets real late."

She remembered Squall saying those same words earlier that night before their walk."I was just really anxious to be back home."_By myself.I didn't even think to check if his car was still here_!

"Do you mind if I stay here tonight?I'm too tired to drive back to my dorm."

She hesitated."Of course.Sure."_How can I say no?_"Why were you waiting for me anyway?"

"See if you wanted to go for a bite to eat...well, that was hours ago."

"I'm sorry."_For all these lies!Especially now!I went back with Squall to the hotel because I didn't feel like lying to you tonight, but now it seems I have no choice.I certainly can't be truthful now to you!_

She went to her bedroom hoping not to converse anymore tonight.He followed her in and started to help her undress.

_No, not tonight of all nights_!She thought of an excuse."Boy, I'm just so tired and exhausted I'm going to go right to sleep.I'm not even going to change."

"Yeah.I understand."Rinoa caught a hint of disappointment on his face.He probably wanted to go to bed also, but not 'asleep'.They crawled under the blanket and Rinoa faced away.He snuggled up behind her spoon-fashion.

_This isn't right at all_, Rinoa thought as she stared at the wall, eyes wide open._Beginning of the night, I fall asleep with one man, sneak out, then spend the remainder with another!?At least I talked Neil out of any naughty ideas he might have had.Oh, my God, if I hadn't he would have found out.My whole body is probably covered with Squall's scent...Wait!Was he wearing any cologne?!No, he wasn't.Phew.That would have definitely given me away.But maybe he can still smell him in my hair, my neck!_

"Good night," Neil said as he leaned in to kiss her.

_Oh, no.Or he could taste Squall on my lips!_Panicking, Rinoa coughed just before he made contact.He immediately pulled away.

"Sorry," she apologized, gave him a quick peck on the cheek, and laid back down in her previous position."Good night."And as this other man eventually fell asleep close to her, all Rinoa did was lay there paranoid, fighting the urge to tremble and begin to cry again, scared to fall asleep and dream about the anguish she created.

**********************************************

The phone on the bedside table rang a few times before the man who was in a deep slumber realized he had to wake up and answer it.

"Ungh?" Squall mumbled into the receiver.

There was no sound on the other end.He squinted his eyes to look at the clock next to the phone.Exactly 7 am.Realizing it was his wake-up call he had programmed in, he clumsily put back the receiver and plopped back onto the mattress.Noticing he was alone in bed, he sat up, rubbed his eyes, and looked around the room.

"Rinoa?" he asked aloud.Her backpack and clothes were gone.He caught a glimpse of the hotel's notepad and pen on the desk right by the door.Crawling out of bed, he approached the note she left for him.After reading it, he sat back down on the foot of the bed pondering her words.

"...Whatever," he mumbled.He was startled by a knock on the door.For half a second he wondered if it'd be her."Who is it?"

"Me," came Zell's voice from the other side.

"Hang on," Squall said a bit disappointed.He picked through the remaining clothes on the floor from last night and pulled on his shorts.Opening the door, he stated, "I thought we agreed to meet in the lobby at 8:00."

"Yeah, I know.But I had trouble sleeping so I got up earlier.I did **not** have a good night last night!Dude, you will **never** believe this!I'm puttin' my manly pride on the line here so--"

Squall nonchalantly popped his bubble."Cindy was a man."

"The lady was a **man**, baby!!"Zell quickly paced around the room and jabbered away."After having a little too many some time after you guys left, she -- 'it' invited me over to her place and I was like, 'Yeeahhh!Score!!' and I walk in and her pad was **so** unfeminine-like so I ask to use her bathroom and there's all this **guy** stuff like aftershave and-- Hey!Wait, you knew?!!!Why didn't you tell me?!!!" 

Zell was shaking.Then on a calm side note, he added, "How come you can finally remember her name?**His** name?"Shock instantly went back into his eyes as he questioned the blasé Squall."I thought you were my friend, man!Why didn't you stop me when--"

"Relax!I didn't find out myself until hours later when Rinoa told me.She said he's a regular at the pub.Her looks fooled me too so don't feel so bad."

"Well...okay, since you didn't know yourself until it was probably too late anyway... Geez, after I came back here screaming, I really had to resist the urge to come find you and proclaim what happened.I was so shocked!But I didn't wanna bother you so late."

Squall began to pick his clothes up off the floor."No, I don't think I would have appreciated that."

Zell was now settling down and plopped on the bed."Say... I thought you were just going to walk Rinoa home last night after her performance.But you said she told you about 'Cindy'," making a disgusted face, "**hours** later... What, does she live at the tip of Long Horn Island or something?"Zell waited for a response; he wasn't surprised when he received none.He knew he'd have to pry it out of him.

"You know, you sure are picking up your stuff pretty quick.You're usually always so neat.I was surprised when I first walked in here and found everything awry--"Zell's eyes widened at the dawn of realization.He shot up off the bed and bounced around."Whoa!You dog!You actually brought her back here and -- I knew it!I could **see** the chemistry still pouring off you two!Heh, heh, it was so obvious the way you guys were acting around each--"

Squall interrupted coldly, "Zell, don't get all excited.It was just a good fuck.Nothing more."He grabbed his duffel and went into the bathroom to shower.

The spiky blond stared at the closed bathroom door."Tch!Okay, then," he shrugged.

As Zell waited for Squall to get ready, he wanted to make a list of supplies they had to get before continuing the mission they started yesterday.He found the notepad on the table with the front page already wrote on.

"Hey, what's this?" he thought out loud.The shower was still running, so Zell let his curiosity take over.He began reading:

_'Dear Squall,_

_ _

_Please forgive me.Just because I left doesn't mean that I think what we did was a mistake.Honestly, I don't know what to think.But I do know a part of me still cares for Neil.And I can't just turn that off like a faucet like it never existed._

_I'm **very** sorry if I hurt you.But I don't even know how you really feel about all this either.Again, I'm truly sorry.I can't express in words how sorry I really am.I need to sort out what I all feel-- for him **and** you._

_Rinoa'_

"Whoa," Zell spoke softly."No wonder he's acting all stuck up this morning.Who's this Neil guy?"The shower water stopped.Zell quickly tore a blank page off the back and put the pad back where he found it.

Moments later Squall emerged fully dressed."All right, I'm ready.Let's go kill some baby snakes."

After stopping and getting the supplies Zell insisted they needed, the two men followed the paved road and headed to the Hasberry Plateaus right outside Dollet.They had to climb the rock face to get to the top of the plateau.Along the way were many crevices and coves.

"Yo, let's stop for a mo'," Zell said out of breath when they reached half way."Doesn't this tire you out at all?You've been climbing non-stop.I thought I was the one with limitless energy," he gasped for air.

Squall ignored him at first, then decided to wait for his friend."Sorry," he apologized."Guess I'm just eager to get this boring trip over with."

"In a hurry to get back to Garden?" Zell thought out loud.

The brunette didn't answer immediately, wondering why he would assume that right away."Not necessarily," and began climbing again.

Squall trudged on, not really concentrating (or caring) what he was doing.His left hand grabbed hold of a loose rock that he thought he could use as a handle to hoist himself higher up.In his quickened pace, his hand slipped along with his left foot also, not expecting the change in balance his body had to accommodate for.There wasn't any other nearby ledge for that hand to grab onto.He held on tight with his right and his body swayed outward, automatically pivoting on the remaining foot still etched into a crevice.None of this phased him as half his body dangled far enough up off the ground, that if he were to fall, he probably wouldn't survive.Still, he didn't look down either.He made his body turn to face the mountainside again, this time moving his way to the side where he had more pieces of rock jutting out for him to use.

The higher they got to the top, the more nervous Zell got."I always considered myself an extreme kinda guy, but why couldn't we have just flown something up here, like the Ragnarok, or get some kind of plane?Instead of having to risk our lives climbing it?!"He looked down at the road **far** far below and got queasy._Ok, that was a dumb thing to do just now._

"Take the Ragnarok and waste its precious energy just so two guys can get to the top of some stupid rock for a stupid mission?"Squall was now at the very top and hoisted himself onto the vast flat surface that overlooked the world for miles.He glanced down at Zell still a few yards below.

"Well, it was just an idea.So we wouldn't get **killed** on this 'stupid mission', as you're referring to it."

"We risk our lives every day.You should be used to it by now."

Zell grumbled lightly to himself._He's being a scrooge again_.When he reached horizontal ground, he kissed the dirt, glad to be at the destination."Ugh, I'm not looking forward to going back down any time soon."

"All right, Zell, do your stuff," Squall said as he looked around for any immediate danger.Zell unloaded the small handheld equipment from his pack that was used to help locate the nests. After he made sure everything was calibrated, they made their way on the rocky terrain.After only a few minutes, the apparatus in Zell's hand was receiving signals that an Anacondaur nest was nearby.The men found it and Squall cast Blizzaga, vaporizing the unhatched eggs.Ice was most effective in vanquishing them since they were weak against Ice attacks.

"Uh, shit, we got company already," Zell said as he saw the mother approaching.

They prepared for battle, Squall drawing his gunblade and casting Protect on them both.The beast gave them the "Squeeze" its first few turns, with Squall returning it with ice spells.The snake was killed quickly before it could even fight back with one of its more powerful attacks.

Several hours later the sun was just beginning to set.The two men were making their way back to the edge of the plateau, satisfied with the amount of monsters they vanquished now that their mission would be done.It would be unsafe to continue once it was dark, and they were instructed to return by train back to Garden the next morning.

They packed up their equipment and climbed back down to the plains right outside the city.Zell, glad to be almost off-duty nudged Squall and said, "Hey, do you wanna hang out at the pub again and relax?Maybe I could get us some hotties for tonight!"

Before he could answer, another Anacondaur accompanied by two Geezards came at them.With their sensory equipment packed, the men were taken by surprise.They focused on ridding the Geezards first, then targeted on the nasty reptile.After getting "Squeezed" a couple more times, Squall was about to cast another Ice spell, but found they were all used up.

"Zell, summon Shiva.I'm all dry," he shouted over.

"What?I thought you junctioned Shiva."

"...No!It doesn't make sense for **me** to hold all the Ice elementals!"

While the two men argued, the Anacondaur's time filled up and took another turn, casting "Poison Mist" on Squall, depleting his hit points even more.

"Shit!" Squall yelled annoyed."What **do** you have?"

"I'm supposed to be the healer!I got Treatment, Curagas, Recover...Wait!What about these Wizard Stones we could refine into Blizzagas!"

"There's no time!"The poison in his body was quickly taking its toll; Squall going lower into the yellow the longer they stood there and didn't fight back."I'm going for my limit break."

Zell quickly cast Treatment to rid Squall of the venom coursing through his body.

He narrowed his eyes and stared directly at the monster, daring it."Come on, son of a bitch!Show me what you're really made of."He ran towards it, pulling the trigger with each swipe.Then gathering all his frustrations and pain, he mustered enough energy to pull off Lionheart, surprising himself with all the negative emotions he was housing that fueled it.

After some fancy slicing and dicing, the Anacondaur dropped to the ground.Squall drank a couple potions and composed himself while Zell picked up a few venom fangs from the fallen snake.

"Cool, we've stolen enough venom fangs to stock Irvine up with tons of dark ammo!"

Squall continued back to town, ignoring Zell.Zell ran to catch up to him."Well, like I was suggesting earlier, you should come with me tonight.Besides, it's easier to pick up girls when you're along.They all flock to you and then I can do the talking--"

The brunette spun to face him."Don't you ever stop thinking about women?!" he exploded."First it was hotdogs.Then you hooked up with Irvine and now it's girls, girls, girls!"With Squall letting off some fumes, he continued, "Maybe if you would control your hormones you would've had the sense to equip some Ice magic on you!"

Zell swallowed and looked away.Squall, realizing what he just done, looked at the ground.He instantly regretted his outburst.

"Sorry," Zell choked out and walked forward.

Squall stood there for a moment and watched his friend he pushed away._Why did I do that_?"Wait.No, I'm sorry," he shook his head."I didn't mean that.I don't know what got into me."

Zell stopped and turned to look back at him."I think I know."Squall furrowed his brow.Zell continued, "I've noticed how you've been acting since this morning.I haven't seen you like this in a long time."

The other man looked at the ground again.Zell explained further, "You think I didn't see that near-fall of yours earlier on the way up?That's why I started to get chicken about climbing it.But it was the way you reacted to the whole thing.It seemed like you could have cared less about the possible consequences."

"It wasn't the time to get scared and back out.I had to keep going," Squall defended.

"And not just that," Zell kept on pressing his point."Your fighting style, it was, like, fearless.You just charged right on up there without any regard to your health even though you'd be hanging by threads...It's like you just stopped caring, in general."

"I had to get rid of the monsters--"

"And...I saw the note she left you," Zell said solemnly."That's why I thought it'd be good for you to get out again, get your mind off of it."

Squall let out an exasperated sigh."Look, that was... I told you earlier...she..it was nothing!"He threw his arms up in the air."And why would I get all upset over nothing?!"He walked rapidly past Zell, back into town.He repeated again, "It meant nothing..."

***************************************

Back in his hotel room, the SeeD commander was sorting through some paperwork he brought with him.Well, attempting to anyway.After a few hours, his mind didn't want to concentrate on the various reports he still had to read up on.Giving up, he reviewed tomorrow's plans for returning home:Depart from Dollet Station at 10:00 am, pass through East Academy, arrive at Timber Station around noon, then take the transfer to Balamb._I don't understand why there isn't just a train straight from Dollet to Balamb.Oh well._

Sitting at the small desk, he rested his chin in his hand and leaned on his elbow._I wonder if Zell is already at the pub.Normally I would have liked to go with him.I wouldn't mind getting really pissed up right now.Get so drunk so I could pass out and stop thinking until we leave tomorrow.But I'd probably drink too much and do something really ridiculous and make a fool of myself.Then I'd feel worse than I already do._

He sighed, realizing his mind was thinking non-stop again._Besides, what if she's there, working, singing, hanging out?It'd be very uncomfortable.No, I should just stay here...But if she **is** there, I wonder what she's doing..._

Abruptly he got out of his chair and ran his hands over his hair._Gah!Squall, what is your problem?!I **need** something to distract me...Of course, why didn't I think of it earlier?_He walked over to his jacket._Because I don't want to become hooked, that's why I didn't think of it_.He pulled out the pack of cigarettes from his inside pocket.He lit one up and plopped on the bed.

"Aah, much better," he said aloud.He watched the smoke he blew out and tried to relax._It's got to be more of a psychological thing why I think I need this, more than the actual drug in the cigarette itself...I suppose Rinoa would know a lot about that..._

He shot up off the bed and slammed the barely used smoke into the ashtray.Pacing the room, he huffed.

_This is pointless!No matter how hard I try, her face, her voice won't escape my though_ts.Tired of fighting with his mind, he plopped back down on his bed and tried to fall asleep, even if that sleep was going to take awhile to show up.

He lay there for what seemed like hours, which in reality was only a half; his mind not really focusing on one certain thing, but a bunch all at the same time:the effects of smoking to his health, once again the health of his fish, Rinoa making fun of him because of his fish, Rinoa staying in his room, Rinoa naked in his bed, other women who had been in his bed... 

He quickly diverted it to work. _Yeah...missions, reports, monsters, animals, dogs, does Rinoa still have her dog?Rinoa's smile, Rinoa naked in my bed, no!Cold showers, rain showers, showers of shooting stars, the smell of Rinoa's skin when she's close to me, the way she hypnotizes me like no other woman could, Rinoa naked in my bed...No!Aaghh!_

Some giggling and hooting could be heard down the hallway and was getting louder, as if it were right outside his door.

There was a knock."Yo! S'up, Squall?You still in there?"It was Zell and his obnoxious loud voice.

_He's back alread_y?"What?" he asked annoyed, not caring to get up off the bed anymore tonight.

"Open up!I got somethin' for ya'!"More giggles.

Not wanting to be rude for a second time this evening to his best friend and turn him away like he did earlier, Squall went to open the door.Zell was standing in the middle with a huge grin from ear to ear, and an arm around a young gorgeous woman on each side of him.

"Squall, I'd like you to meet Betsy on my right," motioning to a tall brunette with green eyes."And Mary here on my left."The second woman was attractive, short with long black hair and brown eyes.She narrowed her eyes seductively at Squall and murmured a soft "hi".

"Ladies, this is my best pal, Squall," Zell said with complete confidence.He then patted him on the shoulder and said, "Since you refused to go party with me tonight, I thought I'd still be a pal and share my good fortune with ya'."Then he quietly added, "And as you can see, I'm not trusting any blondes for awhile.You can thank me later."

Squall remained silent, trying to figure out what was going on.

Zell let go of Mary and turned to the former one he introduced, "Hey, Betsy, let me show you what my room looks like.Looks a lot like this one."

The two continued down the hall with the tall brunette's voice fading, "Oh, Zell, you're so funny!" 

The short black-haired woman remained at Squall's door and smirked.Squall opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out, realizing he had no idea what to say in this situation.

She put her hands on his chest, pushing him inside, "Just the way I like 'em!Tall, dark, and handsome."He could smell alcohol on her breath as he nervously walked backward as she pushed him.

"Look, Melanie--" Squall tried to utter something.

"Mary.I don't care if you forget my name.I've already forgotten yours."She shoved him on the bed."Why does it matter anyway?"She crawled on top of him and straddled him.

_Why do I seem to attract the aggressive ones?...Not that it bothers me **too** much_..."Um...Whoa!Hold on.Wh-what is this?Seldom do I open my door and have a complete stranger run in and try to jump me -- actually, **never** has that happened."He eyed her suspiciously."Is this some kind of a joke?How much is he paying you for this?"

The woman gasped with wide brown eyes and sat there for a moment.Slowly she smiled, "Do you think I'm a prostit--"

"No, that's not what I meant.It's just that Zell has never done something **quite** like this for me in the past."

She purred closer to him."You've got a good friend.A very cute friend.But I prefer you."

She flicked her tongue on the side of his neck and he flinched."Don't worry, I don't bite...Well, maybe sometimes."

Squall felt intruded upon and excited at the same time.How could Zell just do this to him?Just drop off some strange yet beautiful woman at his doorstep and simply tell him to "have a good time"?She continued to trace her mouth along his neck.His blood was still hot from his recurring thoughts earlier when he was trying to fall asleep.

He tried to move higher up on the bed so he wouldn't be pinned down so much by Mary.She followed him, teasing his skin with her tongue.He couldn't deny how it pleasured him, the soft yet firm pressure she gave as she swirled it along his flesh, how warm it felt at first, and the sudden coolness when the air hit the moisture she left behind.

She reached his lips and abruptly stopped a couple millimeters away from them, hovering so close to tease him some more, awaiting his reaction.Squall could almost taste the liquor on her breath now more than before, but didn't pay much attention to it, now that he had more to distract him.Trying to make up his mind in one second, he could be angry with Zell for thrusting this on him, or he could take advantage of it, which is clearly what this woman wanted him to choose also.It was like a fantasy, the opportunity to have a meaningless one night stand with someone who knows absolutely nothing about you, just skip all that awkward getting-to-know-each-other crap and go straight for the sex.

Squall made up his mind and closed the gap between their lips, giving in to temptation and courageously placing his hands on her back.She responded very positively and moved her own hand down to stroke his thigh.He tried to get lost in the taste of her mouth, part of him wishing he had been drinking too now so he could be as brave as she was.

_Should I be letting this happen?This is like deja vu.She even looks very much like Rinoa.What's going to happen after this is finished?Will she just slip out in the middle of the night too?No, I sided with lust last night and look what it did to me!Jesus, I don't even know her at all!_

_ _

Mary could feel him tense up and become apprehensive immediately after he gave in.To counter that, she moved her hand that was stroking the front of his right thigh four inches to the left.

Squall instantly let out a moan and relaxed again._God, damn it, I'm just a man!A man with needs, desires, wants...a man who wants a woman that goes by the name of Rinoa--_

"I can't do this," he said and pushed Mary off of him as he sat up.She ignored him, figuring she could change his mind again and lunged for him.He quickly dodged her and got off the bed.

"Excuse me?"she stated with annoyance.

Without giving it any thought before he answered, he confessed, "I'm in love...with...this woman, and -- I just can't do this.I'm sorry.I just can't."_Did I just say that?!I -- love her...I fell in love with her all over again._

Mary also got up and straightened out her clothes."Zell said you didn't have a girlfriend."

"I don't.I mean...she already...I don't even know you!I don't need to explain my life to you.I'm not obligated to explain anything to you!"

"Okay, okay!Touchy!"She grabbed her purse she threw down immediately when she pounced on him and headed for the door."Oh, well.Your loss.It's too bad.You were so cute too!I guess I'll just go over to your friend's room instead."

"I think your friend, Bertha, Beth, or whatever is already with him."

"So?He found both of us.It's only fitting that he should get both of us too.Our parents did teach us how to share..." she said with a wink.

Squall had to keep his mouth from dropping open.Zell would bow down to him for this.He once confessed to Squall on a night he had been drinking too much (probably on a night just like this one) how "awesome" he thought it would be to have this opportunity.Although he hoped he would be spared the details in the morning.

She eyed the carton of cigarettes on his nightstand."Well, since you won't put out, I think it's only fair you lend me one of your cig's," she said with a little smile, letting on that she wasn't too upset at his refusal.

He couldn't help but smirk a tad also, part of him finding the humor in this whole ordeal."I guess that's fair."He tossed her the whole box."Knock yourself out."

Just as she was leaving, she turned back and said, "And by the way, **Squall**, her name is Betsy.You're not too good with names, are you?"

The attractive Rinoa-look alike that he knew for barely ten minutes left his room.Squall was alone again, now with a whole new set of thoughts to bug him, and no cigarettes._I really do 'love' her, don't I?But I hate that word.The word itself does the real thing no justice.All I know is I definitely feel something for her that is not going away anytime soon._

He continued to lay on the bed with his arms crossed behind his head...._But what can I do about it?If I really wanted to...I could take a peek at the pub and see if she's there, or even walk to her apartment, although I don't know exactly which one she lives in._

He tried to think of all his options, but there was one fact always holding him back._But **she's** the one who left.It was her choice.And obviously her choice was not to stay with me._

_Although...in her note she did say she had to think about how she felt about him **and** me.Does that mean she does have feelings for me, just like I do her?_

He got up off his bed for the umpteenth time and began to pace again._Grrr!I knew this was going to happen when I decided to give in last night.I **knew** I wouldn't be able to dismiss it once it started.There was something deep down in me that was telling me it felt right.But I was afraid of it.I tried to deny it.God, don't I ever change?I used to deny myself all these things before I met her those few years ago._

_...But last night I risked it, lowering my shields like she tried to teach me to do, be more open, it's less stressful than trying to hold it in, she used to say.So I lowered my defenses...and now I have to deal with the suffering because of it._

He turned out his light and crawled onto his bed.He let bitterness take over him.It made it easier to rationalize.**_She_**_ walked out on **me**.I'm not going to walk around town like some pathetic loser looking for someone that might not even want anything to do with me.If she chooses to be with me, she's the one who will have to come to me.She knows where to find me, at least until we leave in the morning._

***Author's Note—I always did wonder why there was no train from Dollet to Balamb.I never understood that.But there is one from **Timber** to Balamb, and that's crossing waters too.Guess it has something to do with the gameplay, they didn't want us to take a train to our first Dollet mission?Who knows.


	4. Part 4

Author's notes: A-ha

Author's notes:A-ha!!This is the last chapter and it is finally up!After many frustrations and useless calls to tech support, I ended up having to finance a **new** computer.(But it's a nice Gateway with nice doo-dads that I never had before!—Like a new word processing program where I can finally save it as an html file instead of text, and have nice-looking formatting like the rest of you guys. So without furthur ado… READ! And review.(Might want to read from beginning again to capture full effect.I _always_ have to do that!)

The birds were chirping as the sun shone through the window slats.Out on the street, the sound of traffic began its busy day in the city with most of its inhabitants going on with their daily routine.It was the start of a beautiful new day.

Squall was usually up at the crack of dawn, but not today.But it wasn't sleep that kept him in bed, more like the lack thereof.He tossed and turned all night, and when he did manage to drift off, it was restless.

He lay there now trying to talk himself into getting up.The wall he had been staring at most of the night was becoming brighter as more light entered the room.During the night, it looked like a perfect paint job even in the dark.Now as the morning hit, he now noticed the imperfections on that wall that he didn't see before, like paint peelings, a few holes from previous wall hangings, etc._Strange how things can seem so right in the moonlight, and with the rise of the sun reality shows everything for what it really is._Tired, he trudged out of bed.He and Zell had a train to catch.

A short while later, Squall carrying all his belongings he packed for this trip, entered the hotel's lobby.He found Zell waiting in a big chair, dozing.Not wanting his mood to be apparent, Squall pushed it back and tried to put on a cheerful facade.Although 'cheerful' wasn't the right word.The closest to 'cheerful' as Squall could ever get would be more of a 'stoic'.He thought he owed it to his friend not to bring him down.He still felt guilty about taking his frustrations out on him after their mission yesterday.

He nudged Zell's sleeping form, attempting to wake him up with a lame joke."C'mon, it's too early for naps.Those aren't on the schedule until 1400 hours."

Zell yawned and stretched out of the chair."Just catchin' some more Z's while I was waitin' for ya'."

"Didn't get much sleep?" Squall asked just to make conversation.Then suddenly he remembered the events of last night.He quickly retracted, "Wait!Don't answer that -- please!"

Zell gave a tired chuckle and smirked.He put out his hand to shake."I just want to say--" and mercifully threw himself at Squall's feet, "You're the best gosh darn buddy a guy could ever have (sniff)."

The brunette rolled his eyes._How did I know he was going to do this?Literally!_"Alright, alright.Stand up.This is embarrassing."

Zell got up off his knees, smiling.

Squall continued lightheartedly."Please.I got the jist of what happened to you last night.I'm very happy for you, congratulations, but **please** don't fill me in on it.I beg you.Tell Irvine all about it when we get back.I'm not the least bit interested."

Zell chewed his lip and put his thinking face on.After a few moments of pondering his friend's words, he was satisfied and shrugged, "Ok," and happily walked out the front wooden doors.

Squall followed."I'm serious.Don't just casually start talking about it in the middle of a conversation 'cause I'll shut you up."

"Fine.You got it, pal," Zell calmly complied.He understood that his friend wouldn't beg for details like he himself probably would.

"Ok, so that's settled."

"I will **not** bring it up."

"Thank you."

The two men proceeded to the train station.Zell glanced over at Squall a couple times, wondering if he was even the **least** bit curious.But then remembered how bummed out he must be.Mary told him that he refused her offer because he was "in love with some woman."He only had one guess as to who that could be.He didn't want to bring up the delicate subject, knowing how his friend liked to remain private.

They walked in silence for about another minute when Squall couldn't take it anymore and blurted, "Ok.I just have **one** question.One question and then no more.End of subject."

Zell turned to him with a cocky smirk."Shoot."

Squall paused for a moment.Then in an intellectually curious tone, he lowered his head, raised his eyes and asked in a low voice, "How was it?"

The zany man grinned widely and nodded slowly, "....Exhausting."

The two men had a good laugh that made Squall temporarily forget his troubles.

The train depot was filled with several busy people each with their own agendas: families on vacations, businessmen on their daily commutes to their offices in Deling, and the occasional straggler who didn't own a vehicle.There were people everywhere they looked.

The two SeeDs each grabbed a seat amongst the other future passengers that would be riding their train.Still, among all these people, Squall felt alone –- empty.Even having his best friend sitting right next to him couldn't fill the gap he felt in his being.It was like a hole formed in a place he couldn't recall feeling empty before…Except… for when he thought he lost her in time compression when they were 17._Yes, it felt just like this!God, the void, the hopelessness.It was so awful.Then everything turned out to be all right afterwards, and I didn't think I'd have to worry about feeling that way again.Even after we broke up, it didn't hurt then either.We both needed that; there was no pain…Then I shouldn't be feeling pain now, right?_

Zell, not being one to sit long, got up and started shadow boxing in a corner in the waiting area.A few of the people waiting for the same 10:00 train as the SeeDs, exchanged nervous glances, a few considering hopping on the next train that followed.

The movements of the fisted fighter shook Squall out of his depressing trance._I hate myself for being like this!There's no use in feeling this way._

He stopped watching Zell and peeked at his watch, 9:40.

_They should be making the boarding call soon._

Zell, still in his corner, now moved on to practicing kicks.Security officers were now looking at him funny.

_I'm bored.At least Zell found something to do._

A man in a uniform approached Zell cautiously and tapped him on the shoulder.Zell, lost in his own world, jumped at the interruption.Seeing he had an audience, he shyly bowed his head and walked back to his seat.Upon returning, he heard Squall quietly humming a tune.

.._Train, train, take me away…to a place far away-- _

Zell elbowed him in the ribs."Dude, and I thought what I was doing was embarrassing!" 

Squall realized he was humming Selphie's 'train' song –- in public._What the hell am I doing?!I need to get out of this city!_

_ _

Spotting some vending machines along the wall, Squall stood up to fish some change out of his pocket.He pulled out a crumpled piece of paper that he thought to be a dollar gil.

***************************************

_Please don't let me be too late!Please don't let me be too late!_ she thought to herself as she paced through the station, searching for the gate for trains departing Dollet.She left in the middle of an important lecture, deciding this was more important right now than anything.

***************************************

The crumpled paper turned out to be the note Rinoa left him two nights ago.He remembered stuffing it in his pocket when he was packing and getting ready to check out of the hotel.He began to reread it.A phrase stuck out to him.

_"…But I don't know how you feel about this either…"_

_ _

_No, Rinoa, you don't.You didn't stick around to find out…But it's not like I planned to feel anything in the first place._He stuffed the note back in his pocket_.But does anyone actually **plan** to fall in love?_

***************************************

She rounded a corner and spotted Zell sitting among other people._But where's Squall?_She scanned the area and saw him standing, facing away from her, looking down and reading something.Her heart jumped.

_This is it.Should I be doing this?_She held in her hand the homemade replicated ring and necklace given to her.Even though she stopped wearing them a few years ago, she kept them safe in a drawer since they held so much sentimental meaning at one time.She dug them out last night after her talk with Neil.

_I need to do this.I have to let him know how I feel, no matter what.Even if he doesn't want to listen…But what if he really doesn't?What if he refuses to even look at me?I don't know if I could handle that._

She squeezed the jewelry in her palm, trying to draw the courage that the lion's emblem held._If I were him, I wouldn't want anything to do with me either._Doubts were overtaking her mind and she was getting scared._Who am I kidding?I can't just show up like this and expect him to forgive me!_

_ _

He stuffed whatever he was reading in his jeans and turned a bit. She could see the side of his face._His expression -- it looks… bitter._

Hot tears were forming on her lids and she looked down, mad at herself for not being able to hold them back._I'm not doing this.I can't go through with it, especially like this.I just keep breaking down!_She quickly turned and walked briskly back the way she came.She tilted her head down and shaded her eyes with her hand, attempting to not attract any attention while tears poured down her cheeks non-stop in the defeat of courage.

****************************************

Squall turned in the direction to sit back down until he thought he saw a flash of long black hair out of the corner of his eye.Instead of going to his seat, he headed to where he saw the image._It looked like her height.Could it have been…no.I'm just tired and now I'm seeing her wherever I go from thinking about her too much_.

Still, he couldn't shake the curiosity from his mind_._He glanced back at Zell slumped in his seat, apparently he had fallen asleep again already._Hell with it.I've just gotta know_!

(("The train to East Academy will be boarding shortly."))

He turned the corner where he first saw the black-haired person and searched the crowd.There were still lots of people everywhere, almost making it impossible to pinpoint the mysterious person.Just then he saw her again, at the end of the hallway turning another corner.She was definitely female judging by the way she moved.

He tried to politely push his way through the crowd.By the time he arrived at the spot he saw her last, she was nowhere to be seen._Maybe_ _I'm chasing a ghost._

This time he jogged down this hallway, hoping to see her walking in an adjoining one.When he got to the end, he had two choices, either left or right.Squall glanced to the right, nothing.He glanced to the left, there she was!He could only see the back of her head among the traffic of people.

Trying to sprint, he bumped into several people and received a few dirty looks._I'm almost up to her!But I'm afraid to call out her name, what if it's not her?_

She was keeping close to the wall and walking fast.Squall was now only a couple yards from her and could make out her figure._It **is** her!But why, what reason does she have to be here, and practically running for the exit?_

He cautiously put a hand on her shoulder.She spun at the intrusion of her escape, startled.She lowered her hand in shock that was shielding her face.Squall could see by her puffy eyes and wet cheeks that she had been crying.

Out of breath, he was the first to speak.His fast heartbeat felt like it was in his throat, and not just from running."Rinoa, I thought that was you…," tentatively reaching out gloved fingers to wipe the moisture off her cheeks, "…why are you crying?What are you doing here?"

She felt like a deer caught in headlights.She couldn't move or talk."Uh… umm –- I… ah –-" she managed to spit out._His hand, touching my face like this.And those eyes.He –- he looks genuinely concerned.Oh, how I miss those blue eyes.Why is he doing this?Why is he acting so… compassionate?Towards me?_She could only stare back at him, mesmerized by the look on his face: caring, incredulous, confused… now turning into worry.

"Rinoa?"

She became extremely nervous the more she stood there.Thoughts escaped her, for a long moment she couldn't remember her motive for being there in the first place.After chickening out back there, she didn't expect to ever see him again.And here he stood again in front of her after chasing her down.

If she was ever going to get her head back together, she looked away from his entrancing expression and once again covered her eyes.

"God, I feel so embarrassed," she said, not sure of how to start._Dumby, say more than that!Why didn't I plan this out first?I just ran here without choosing the words I was going to say?_

Taking a deep breath and squeezing the jewelry still in her palm, she started, "I came here…to try and catch you before you left."She stole a quick glance to make sure he was still there. Squall looked very confused, which made Rinoa feel even more ashamed than she was already, knowing he was wondering why she was running away from him instead.

She forced on, "I don't know any other way to say this, so I'm just going to say it."She hastily dried her eyes with the back of her hand and bravely looked up to him._I have to be strong.I got a second chance and I'm **not** blowing it this time.No tears.Just the truth._

"What I did to you, the other night when I left… I was really confused.I was having feelings that I didn't expect to have and it scared me.I didn't know if I should stay, go…I mean, if I would've stayed, would I have been unwelcome in the morning?You know, intruding on your life?**I** was the one who just sort of invited myself in on your night off, after all.Or would it be the opposite?Maybe you were expecting to still see me in the morning."

Rinoa paused to try to read his face.He looked indifferent, not angry nor happy.She continued, glad he was still willing to listen."So I copped out.I made a decision and went back to my normal life, trying to stabilize myself again, thinking that would be the best for both of us…But actually I _wasn't_ thinking.I had so many emotions running through my clouded mind and my judgment was working for shit."

She took a shaky breath.Squall remained quiet."I went home and Neil was still there; he had fallen asleep waiting for me."Sadness entered her voice and she chuckled bitterly."There was no way I could tell him what I just did.Ironic.After all that, I still ended up lying to him that same night."

Squall still held a passive disposition.Rinoa bowed her head out of shame.Shame for how she treated Squall, shame for how she deceived Neil…_Is he disgusted with me?His face isn't telling me anything!Just keep talking, Rinoa.Don't stop until you've told him everything._

"I've been doing a lot of thinking since then.A _lot_ of thinking… and not much sleeping.Squall…" she looked into his eyes, trying to convey the sincerity that her trembling voice couldn't match, "…the night we spent together –- and I don't just mean the sex, I mean the whole night: seeing you at the pub, you hearing me sing, sharing a hundred laughs –- I didn't want it to end, despite my later actions."

Rinoa shuffled her feet slightly."Last night, I came to a point where my guilt for not being truthful to Neil was just eating me alive.So…I told him.I told him everything.Well, except for the sorceress part."She hoped Squall would understand why she didn't come clean with that fact.She cleared her throat before continuing, "I also told him… that I wasn't in love with him."

It was getting harder for Rinoa to keep it together.She was aware that her voice was shaky, her knees were about to buckle, and she was light-headed from unconsciously holding her breath._What's happened to me?I used to be so strong.I could stand up to anything, especially when I believed in it…Maybe I need my knight again to restore my confidence._

"After he left, I sat there, alone in my apartment, and thought about my life.About who I am, _what_ I am, the friends I've had, the relationships…It felt great to get the lies I told him off my chest and to figure out where he stood in my heart."

(("Now boarding the train to East Academy."))

_Oh, no!That's his train.I've got to get the point.I can't let him leave until I've got this all out in the open._Squall didn't seem to react to the boarding call.

Rinoa mustered up every last ounce of the willpower she had left.She stood tall again and met his gaze,"But something was still bothering me.There was still another situation I had to resolve.I spent the rest of the night knowing what I had to do next…But I was afraid.Embarrassed, ashamed at how I walked out after what you and I shared.I figured either you could've cared less, or you hated me and thought I was just using you…But, Squall, it wasn't like that at all.The time we spent, I enjoyed every minute of it.All my actions that night came from the desires of my soul, not just my body."

Her pleading eyes were still on his.Finally she was able to at least read something from them –- pity?_Does he pity me?I must look pathetic to him.I'm practically falling apart at the seams._

"What I'm trying to say is…you, Squall, are the only man I've ever truly loved._You_ are the only one who understands me and that I can trust."She couldn't stand to see him continue to look sorry for her, so she broke their gaze and shut her eyes tight._I'm losing it again._

"If you want nothing to do with me, I completely understand.All I'm asking is for you to please forgive me--"Her last word caught in her throat and she knew if she were to speak another, the remainder of her composure would be lost. 

She swallowed and forced her eyes open, preparing to see him one last time before he left for good.

What she thought to be pity from her past lover's facial expression was actually empathy, for Squall was feeling the same pain that Rinoa had endured the last couple days.Just that he didn't have the guts to come forward like she had right now._I can tell this must have been very hard for her…Oh, Rinoa, you think you're weak for coming to me, but **I'm **the one who's weak by allowing myself to be miserable instead of doing the brave thing like you did._

_ _

Squall finally spoke."I admit I didn't have any intention of anything happening between us beyond that night.I told myself over and over that I wasn't going to get involved, mainly because of the circumstances: you have your own personal life here, I'm always traveling and busy with my job…"He stated firmly, "You were seeing another guy.Who would I be to jeopardize whatever you had going on with him?The last thing I wanted was to be stuck in some complicated love triangle."

Rinoa's heart sank._Of course.I'm a fool.I instigated this whole mess._

He softened, "…but those were just excuses."

Rinoa's heart lifted anchor and began to float back up with the tiniest bit of hope._Is he saying what I think he is?_She cherished the touch of his hand on her arm as he guided them more off to the side so their conversation could be a little more private.

This time it was Squall who took a deep breath."Do you remember when we had that argument outside your apartment, when I asked how you could expect to be serious with the one you love if you weren't honest with them?"

She nodded, "Of course, that's what got me thinking about all this."

Squall paused before explaining further.Looking down, and much to Rinoa's surprise, he slowly took one of her hands in his, and continued."Well, I realized that that applies to me too.At first I tried to shut out my feelings to make things less complicated, but when we began to get intimate… I knew it would be impossible to not let you in.And I also admit that I _was_ shocked to not see you there the next morning.But it's not like I _expected_ you to stay, either.So I went back to telling myself that it was no big deal, I didn't want any emotional attachment anyway, right?Well, to make a long story short… I was in denial all day and it took a couple odd situations to make me realize the truth.Now that I've found to be honest with _myself_, I also have to be honest with you, because…__

"…_you_ are the one _I_ am in love with, Rinoa."

He squeezed her hand he was holding and felt something metallic dangling from it.He looked down to inspect it and opened her palm.A little smile curved up the corners of his mouth as he recognized it.

"You still have these?"

Rinoa, overwhelmed by his confession, answered in a cracked voice, "I would never give these up."

Squall took the gifts from her hand and held up the tiny Griever necklace."May I?"

On the verge of tears, she found she couldn't answer.Squall reached behind her neck and delicately clasped the necklace.

The act brought back special memories to both from a SeeD ball, a beach, and an interesting shower.Rinoa touched the fragile symbol of their connection again hanging around her neck and asked in a half whisper, recreating the scene, "How does it look?"

Squall scanned from the necklace on up to her flushed face.

"She's beautiful."

Rinoa let out a short intense burst of sound, which consisted of a laugh, shriek, and sob all mixed into one, followed by the sudden rush of the most ecstatic tears she had ever cried.At the same time she threw her arms around her love's neck and embraced him with all the joy and relief that poured from her renewed spirit. 

Squall held her just as tight, silently vowing to never ignore what his heart was telling him again.

(("Last call for the train to East Academy!"))

They quickly broke from the embrace and looked at each other with wide eyes."Squall! Isn't that your train??"

"Zell!!"

He grabbed her hand and whisked her through the hallways that they both previously ran down earlier in other states of mind.When they arrived at the waiting area, the whole room was cleared except for Zell, still slumped over in the chair snoozing, just like how Squall left him.Apparently none of the other passengers bothered (or cared to) wake him up.-–Wonder why.—

Squall, with Rinoa in tow, ran over to Zell and shook him."Wake up!You're about to miss the train!"

Zell jumped out of his seat at the sudden commotion, sticking out his hands like a traffic cop would."Huh?Oh!Yeah!!C'mon, Squall!!!…Rinoa?Where did you come from?!"

"There's no time for that.You have to get on the train before it leaves without you!"

"Without **me**?Aren't you coming too?"The conductor moved to the side to allow Zell to board.Rinoa looked at Squall, confused.

He put his arm around her waist and said to Zell who was now standing on the entrance steps, "Tell Cid I'm taking a personal day and staying here an extra night."He then looked at Rinoa, "…if that's okay with you."

Not expecting this spontaneous gift of time given to her to spend with him, she stared open-mouthed at him and exclaimed, "Of course!!!"

Zell saluted with a smile, happy that his friend worked out his problems and was now at peace. "You got it, bud.Rinoa, always a pleasure.Have fun and don't do anything I wouldn't do!" He walked inside the car and sat down by a window to wave out.

Squall turned to his partner still attached to his side, "I don't even do the things he **would **do!"

Rinoa laughed at his rare humor and suddenly remembered something very important.She shouted over to the window as the train began to slowly pull out, "Hey, Zell!Could you please check on his fish until he gets back?"

This time her comment made Squall laugh instead.They closed the space between each other once more and finally sealed their reunion with a kiss; much like the first one they shared on a balcony five years ago, signifying a new beginning for their relationship.

THE END

Author's notes:I sure hope I gave everyone some nice closure and that everyone liked it.I've been writing this since last Thanksgiving and it's finally finished!Although it's sad for it to come to an end.Just like the game.I have all these ideas for follow-up but, it's mainly all fluff.No action or angst like this one.If anyone is interested in reading more, let me know.This was so much fun!Thanks for all the reviews!


End file.
